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The views presented below are the author’s own and are not in any manner representative of the views of Vox Populi as a body or IIT Kanpur in general. This is an informal account of the author’s experiences at IIT-K.
In the 84th edition of As We leave 2026, Kaushal Jain, a Y22 from Department of Mathematics and Statistics writes one last time for publishing on Vox’s website – but not as an editor. He does take us on the ride of his rollercoaster journey in 4 years across academics, extracurriculars, placements etc. but also presents his perspectives on various social aspects associated with IITK developed over his journey. He also tries to appreciate the people he met in his journey and suggests you find your name by Ctrl+F before starting.
Hello everyone ! Thanks for turning up on the website to look into this not so small part of my life. I wish to start by thanking Deeksha, Manya and the whole Vox team – the kids who helped me write this. I did start writing AWL very early but due to the offer being revoked, I had to push deadlines and they were so supportive in the process and accommodated my request. They are the only ones due to which I was able to write it.
Whoever is reading this, I want to let them know that I have written this account since 11th Feb and on multiple days – so different sections have different timelines and you may find it a bit lost due to the async nature of timeline and I apologize for the same. I have shared my contact at last if someone wishes to connect. So let’s start !
INTRODUCTION
So after planning a lot on what to write in my As We Leave, writing throughout the semester, I am starting off on the morning of 11th Feb 2026 in between Galaxy preparations. I don’t know how many people will read it, but I planned to write it long because I consider AWL as that one document which contains many bits of my campus life which I can go through anytime in my life ahead. But yes there might be some interesting parts for you to read. Nevertheless here are the sections of my AWL:
- First Semester
- Academics
- Editor by Mistake @ Vox Populi
- Non Campus Life
- Intern and Placements (Not so boring, may give a read – especially who will be sitting for intern and placements)
- Thank You Seniors
- Thank You Juniors
- Last Semester
- Workers of IITK
- IITK Appreciation
- Hall Politics and General Championship
- Elections
- Mental Health
- Admin@ IITK
- Campus Discourse
- Fursatiya Forever @ Dramatics Club (Have kept it later as its the longest section)
- Conclusion
FIRST SEMESTER
I have no plans to write things semester wise. But I wish to tell how I started my journey here, and how it was a rollercoaster, eventful time altogether. Not putting things in sequence-
Had friends from hometown here – Riddhima, Vedant, Vaibhav- so did not feel out of place
Met Vedanshi online and then in orientation
Met Gupil in one of department meets
And then later met several other people through them – Ankit, Devansh, Vanshika etc.
Spend the whole day and nights in some or other group at various places. Vibing at OAT or studying at RM, along with a lot of jokes. Attending classes together, eating together and a lot more. One of the funny moments was getting scolded by DOAA for playing cards in front of L18. In between, running in HC as some or other person is getting ill. In between came freshers and freshers inferno, everyone doing some or other stuff. Many other crazy stuff including parties, birthdays, holi etc. Getting caught by the professor of MTH112 for marking attendance from outside the class. RM was like an adda for us – to study, to have fun, to sleep, to watch movies and planning if any. Any regrets – not contesting for senator elections. I always liked politics, so joined Vox too.
Another incident I remember (not the best of memories) – 15th Jan 2023 – birthday of Riddhima, enjoying a lot and suddenly got a call from one of seniors(claiming him to be CTM) – saying that he has received a complaint against me in Gender Cell, and I was immediately called upon to Hall 3, to my Baap Wing. There I was threatened about SSAC by the whole Baap wing and they were asking me to think what I have done wrong. I thought maybe during Treasure Hunt, I had a c***om in bag and that is the reason. By listening to this, they all (a group of 10+ seniors) laughed aloud and said to me it was all a prank.
They planned it with my wingies for a healthy interaction. I like these kinds of interactions although that day it took me 1.5 hours which caused me to miss the birthday celebrations and that hurt me a bit. But these interactions are very necessary in the first semester for sure. It helped me ease with a lot of seniors
In terms of academics – was one of the semesters where I went class honestly. I liked MTH111 (despite being disliked by the whole batch), and my expectations were high from the department front then. Associated with it was the late night teaching this course to multiple people before quiz and midsems. But the significant part to it was ESC112. Why ? When I was shown my endsem copy of the course – it was written on paper that I was suspected for cheating that too in a subjective paper. Hilarious and dangerous at same time. I was told by the TA that the professor will call me himself to take my defence. I had not cheated and I was confident enough to defend so I did not worry much. I was chilling and then one day came the results of the semester but my grades did not. When I inquired, I got to know Prof. had withheld my grades along with 10 others. In panic, I mailed him to meet and provide clarification but he said that he has forwarded the case to DOAA.
I was like – what kind of f*cked up system is this – firstly I did not cheat, and even if you suspect, why you did not give me chance to defend. Then I expected DOAA to reply but I got to know he forwarded the case to SSAC. This frightened me a bit and more to my parents that they came to campus to see me. It was all happening in the end semester breaks, I was busy with Antaragni practice of Dramatics, which used to go up to 15+ hours and then all this shit happened. The SSAC chair first called a meeting before Antaragni and then postponed it to post Techkriti. I got back to my work. And then suddenly I got my grades on pingala and I did not fail in ESC112. That means case solved ? I thought so until I got an email about the SSAC meeting again. We were called upon, we were asked about the case. We told our side of the story and then at last one person said we have got our grades on pingala. By listening to this, the chairman said then the case is of no use and you can go. Again such a hilarious end to my mind toll of 1.5 months which show how this admin system is crazy in itself, and this is how my first semester ended.
Currently I have written all this on a light note, but when in first semester, such incidents drain you. On day 1 of interaction with Bapu and other seniors, I was warned to be as far as possible from SSAC and Gender cell, and I got a slight taste of both in first semester only.
Shoutout to Abhishek, my roommate from first year – the best one can get. We vibe so well that cannot be explained to anyone. Helped me a lot as APC ! Shoutout to our other roommate – Bhavik. Spent a good time without a cooler. Too much chaos and fun.
Shoutout to Gupil, Riddhima, Vedanshi – the best people I have ever met in my campus life. May not be good friends now but always have great respect for them.
ACADEMICS
It’s 28th Feb – I just finished with my last Mid semester exams of IIT Kanpur so what would be a better day to write on academics. I have been a studious student for most of my school life. I took Science Maths in 11th for the purpose of exploring subjects and not JEE Advanced – primarily for my liking towards Mathematics. That continued after JEE too – choosing Mathematics and Scientific Computing here. I was one of few who knew about the toughness of the curriculum of the branch, and still took it for one simple idea – to pursue research.
My first 2 semesters went well, especially with Math courses. But I got a hard reality of the department in 2nd year, precisely from 4th semester. Toughness of curriculum is one part but more than that was the issue with professors. I can’t name them in this account but they live in some other fantasy world. Their teaching is screwed and then they set as tough exams as possible that you even lose hope to study because that becomes irrelevant. Literally it’s that one department where attending regular classes even can’t help you. On top of that, what a crazy grading policy – it’s almost an absolute scale for almost all courses even when the average falls below 20.
All professors are not like that, there are some good ones too who have more intent of teaching rather than just screwing up kids and failing them arbitrarily. But those goods are just outliers. On top of all this we have f*cked up department policies – no one can take an MTH course in the summer semester. Like what the hell – you destroy the lives of students and then not even let him save himself. The number of degree extended students is very high in the department and still this is an unofficial policy in place. It won’t be extreme to say they are waiting for some unfortunate incident to happen the way they torture students. I have several similar examples of this kind of shit.
I still like mathematics as a subject and there is a lot beauty in it – Analysis, Numerical Analysis, Set Theory, Statistics etc. but I have lost interest in pursuing research because of academic fear that have been spread by my department in 4 years and how it has broke me and several other down because of grades precisely. I have been punished for my efforts.
But to mention, I have had a taste of research in the form of SURGE. It was a good experience, different from coursework at least. Thanks to Professor Akash Anand and a PhD student under her, Dr. Damini ma’am. It ignited the hope to at least pursue some study ahead of bachelors too.
Apart from MTH, the good part of academics I have is HSS courses under Professor Suchitra Mathur. I have done 2 ENG courses under her in my final year. Doing it with your friends makes it more interesting, as it has a Group Presentation component. HSS has a few goated professors who can teach you crazy stuff and is a good side hustle kind of. I suggest people to pursue one HSS course under Ma’am, without much concern of grade.
Rest I do not have many academic memories here at IITK. (IRONY !)
Appreciation for my MTH buddies – Rudraksh, Tushar, Vedanshi, Sruthi and Garima. Able to finish off on time due to you guys only.
EDITOR BY MISTAKE @ VOX POPULI
I joined Vox in my first year as CGM for my passion of journalism. I became assistant editor for the sake of PoR. So was the reason I became Editor. Actually I was not even applying for Editor at first point, thanks to then Chief Editors (Y21s) who convinced me to apply. I did a great work throughout the tenure (at least I think so) and did a lot of unconventional work which reignited my passion for journalism. The website is witness to the same. My instagram story highlights tell my journey within Vox.
Somewhere down the line this became the reason for me applying for Chief Editor (which I was not applying earlier). I very well knew I had the least odds of becoming the same and when I started the preparations, my first statement in my notebook was “A very tough battle, 1 v/s 6.” I tried for the simple reason, because my voice was regularly suppressed within the body and there was subtle suppression of the journalistic aspect of Vox. I knew if I did not become Chief Editor, not much serious and meaningful journalism would happen.
This eventually led me to meeting 60+ people in 5 days for making a presentation. Great effort, good time but finally in vain. I did not become Chief Editor for the reason that I am more journalistic as well as work oriented and that is against the very culture of Vox. The results were a surprise for many although. All that has been history and I do not want to comment on the tenure that went ahead. The audience can make fair judgement.
P.S. – Vox Chief Ed interviews are as crazy as Coordinator interviews of clubs.
Can talk about all this in detail if anyone is interested to hear. I do lately appreciate my time at Vox and the people I met. A lot thanks to Vedanshi, Sruthi, Kushagra, Yash, Aujasvit, Zehaan, Sanyam, Shivam, Mayur, Pranav, and others for good times at Vox, and for friendships throughout.
NON CAMPUS LIFE
It’s the 2nd of March, and I am at my home during the last mid semester break. So good to talk about non campus life. To mention simple things first – I have not been on any long trips with any of my acquaintances during all 4 years, and this hit me harder today more and more. It’s very disheartening for me but I can’t help.
Nevertheless, I have been on three 1-2 day visits to Prayagraj (for Kumbh), Lucknow and New Delhi at the start of 6th, 7th, and 8th semester respectively and that is it. In most midsem breaks either I have been to home or else been on campus. More interestingly, I have not been home ever for more than a week continuously. In all endsem breaks, I have been on campus except the one when I went to intern to Bangalore.
Why I am telling this is it has two parts to it:
Firstly the obvious one, do go on trips with your friends, it makes the best memories. I regret not having one long trip but I fondly remember my 3 short trips as they were so random.
Second thing which is a bit odd for most people, I see people always trying to go home and avoiding campus whenever they get a chance and I really cannot understand this phenomenon – this campus is such a beautiful and free space that you live here to the fullest (or at least you can). Apart from academic pressure, it’s the best place to be. You may not realise that until you leave it and go for intern/jobs. I have literally missed it every day while in Bangalore (even missing right now).
This campus is so home to me and I really do not know how I will leave it. I can talk about this more if someone wishes to talk – but I urge all juniors to stay on campus for maximum time possible. I still remember the good old days of summers of 1st and 2 years and how we used to have fun here in downtown – projects, sleeping, cycling, PoRs, Cricket, Dramatics and anything else you can think of. This time won’t come back, stay here else you will miss a part of your heart.
INTERN AND PLACEMENTS
This is the boring part and I will not discuss this much in detail. Following is the link for my internship story – The More You Know #1: SDE. Internship preparation journey of… | by AnC Council, IIT Kanpur | Medium
I worked as a Data Science intern in Oracle and then got a pre placement offer. So I was chilling in 7th semester, and more concerned about the placements of my friends as none had PPOs. Placement season was another crazy event for me.
I was managing logistics for 15+ people and I was grateful to be helped by the best juniors on campus – Dramatics Y23 and Y24, Hall 3 HEC kids and few more. Running here and there in worry from 30th November morning. No sleep till 2nd December eve, not even food with leg pain and what not. Totally broken and drained on 3rd December, but finished most of the job till 8th December. So many interesting stories to tell if someone wishes to know.
It’s 8th July – the above paragraphs were written way back in February but then came one more rollercoaster low of the journey. On 13th May, I was having Dramatics Club batch video shoot, and as soon as it got over – I received a call from an SPO kid informing me about revocation of my offer from Oracle. This was something I was anticipating for a while because there was a delay in offer letter processing and was reading news headlines too. I broke down immediately because I would be leaving campus on the morning of May 16th. I had to recollect and move ahead.
I prepared my resume and uploaded it on LinkedIn – and that was crazy ! For the first time I understood the true meaning of connections, networking etc. because it was all happening live in front of me. The post got 4 Lakhs+ impressions, 4k+ Likes, 550+ comments – this was insane reach. I can tell you honestly that “CFBR” matters a lot. From that one post, I got so many interview calls – for all kinds of company and roles. To give an example – I put the post on 14th Evening, during batch farewell and I had an interview on 15th Evening – crazy ! I connected with many people and alumni – all helped me a lot and thanks is a very small word for it. I am grateful to whoever reacted to my post, connected on LinkedIn and referred for various roles.
But the real issue – I was not prepared for interviews. I had command on my resume but not on DSA, ML and other things. DSA was not escapable as I faced multiple rejections constantly in May. I then started again with DSA – honestly for the first time in 4 years. Days got plain and depressing – either spent applying, preparing or interviewing. In due process – I visited Gurgaon twice and Hyderabad once for offline interviews. After all the efforts, the situation did improve a bit. The process had been very lonely, with a bit of pressure of being at home. I also had to curb my various activities – people might not be seeing my instagram stories for a long time.
The number of people who helped me in this tough time is not countable. Really grateful to all of them but special mentions to Utkarsh, Vrinda and Nitish – my go to seniors for all my confusions, who always listened to me patiently. Sorry to not mention others. I also felt what real friendships are – as everyone says for placements. Only a few gems keep a check on me regularly – seniors, juniors, batchmates, but not those maybe for whom I ran a lot. Appreciation for SPO too – who helped me in their best capacity.
The day I am writing this, I am not sure when and where I will be joining. If I get that confirmed any time soon, I will surely add that.
Obviously I can elaborate more on this in detail, if someone wishes to know. I would not insert any motivation or gyaan for this incident because in tough times – it’s hard to comprehend that. But for sure – always up there for help. I just can’t explain how great alumni of IIT Kanpur are, and how helpful they are. Just keep connecting and be always proud of them.
THANK YOU SENIORS
Why I am writing this – because my journey is shaped by various people making it more and more beautiful and one to be cherished – be it seniors, co batch mates or juniors.
Firstly thanks to all the super seniors of Dramatics Club – Aditya, Ghanshyam, Yatharth, Devang, Lakshay, Akhil, Parth, Akshat, Utkarsh, Suyash, Shubham, Rudraksh, Shreyansh for all their guidance and efforts for making this place.
More thanks to Y21s – Nitish, Devabrata, Bhawin, Gurudutt, Aditya, Aryan, Aryan, Narrotam, Eesh, Anushka, Divyansh, Sushmit – for making us fall in love for this place and for all bkchodi. Helping and guiding across foyer, dram room or even in hall.
Special thanks to Devabrata, Sushmit, Akhil for helping in the process of flow making.
Also a bigger thanks to Nitish, for helping me and my batch, in various ways – academic, club, placements, non academic and literally every possible thing, including finances hehe. Also as mentioned about Devabrata – gem of a person.
Thanks to Zainab, Mutasim for providing me an opportunity to work as an editor at Vox, helping me and guiding me through the process of covering stories and campus issues.
Thanks to Utkarsh, Vrinda, Kunaal, Gauravi for providing a great work experience at Vox. Thanks to Sanika, Bhavya too for the same and for being so nice and helpful always
Special thanks to Utkarsh and Vrinda for helping me otherwise too – for academics and placements and hearing me out in a state of crisis. Always the pookie seniors.
Thanks to Manjeet (Bapu), Chitresh and other wing bapus for your guidance as well as help during various difficult times, especially in the SSAC case.
Thanks to Shantanu, Arush, Avi, Paramveer, Jayant, Mayank, Rishi, Bhanu, Rahbar and others for motivating kids like me for participating in GC
Mentions to Shreya, Kaustubh, Kinshuk, Lakshay, Dhruv, Atharv, Saicharan, Sajal, Shivansh and various others who helped me make my journey better. Sorry if I forgot to mention someone.
Many more seniors and alumni deserve appreciation – felt their greatness post my offer revoke and job search. Just cannot mention all.
THANK YOU JUNIORS
As opposed to campus purview, I used to enjoy with my juniors, and liked to be more of a friend to them. (Don’t know if they have the same feeling hehe)
Will surely start by appreciating juniors of club – Shubham, Jaiveer, Daksh, Rohit, Ansh, Neeraj, Adarsh, Ashish, Mohnish, Divyaman, Shruti, Jaini, Shreyansh, Prateek, Aryan, Srishti for their efforts and dedication for club. Also thanks to most of them for their help at various times, especially in placements.
Appreciations to Daksh and Jaiveer for bearing the discussions of flow with me.
Special mention for Galaxy times to Shubham, Rohit, Ansh, Neeraj, Shreyansh.
Thanks Divyaman for political help at times hehe.
I have said that already, these guys are the best juniors one can have in this campus.
Appreciation note for Y24s of the club for the same – Vishvas, Sai Eshan, Siddharth, Jayendra, Karan, Vivekananda, Suryans, Piyush, Harry, Aditya, Priyansh, Pranjali, Manasvi, Nikita, Jagriti.
Appreciation to Atul, Devansh, Kshitij, Deep, Purav, Prasun, Amlan, Parth and other Hall 3 kids for efforts in Hall, especially in Galaxy. Special thanks for help in placements and otherwise.
Thanks for good time at Vox – Aaliyah, Aashika, Amogh, Ayush, Brinda, Dhriti, Disha, Divyanshi, Himanshu, Sanket, Shubham, Manya, Pankhuri, Raziq, Sanchit, Vaishnavi, Vedant, Vibha, Yeva
Special mentions to Aashika, Amogh, Divyanshi, Sanchit, Vaishnavi for non Vox discussions and friendships. Cool kids and good to vibe with.
Other cool kids I have been knowing lately – Areen, Chirag, Palak, Yashasvi, Rigved, Srujan, Anisha, Ayush
Sorry to not mention various kids who helped me a lot in intern season, placement season. There are many more kids to appreciate who have made this campus a beautiful place for me. Those who participate in Galaxy, in Drams, worked with me in Vox, or involved in academic or intern related discussions, or just gave me T on campus. I hope to stay connected with you guys.
The above painting was made and gifted by Haryashva aka Harry (Y24, Dramatics Club) – Kudos to him and thanks for his love and efforts.
LAST SEMESTER
It’s 20th March, Day 1 of Techkriti – Nucleya performing at Pronite ground and I am writing this. I am not a big fan of fests concerts here at IITK. I have attended 3 Pronites in my 4 years – 2 in first year and 1 in 3rd year, all of Techkriti. I have simple reasons for that – to enjoy either you should be drunk, or you should have a female partner to enjoy with, else you have good friends to enjoy with. I have none and that’s my story of last semester too. I am part of no good friend circle. I came to the F-Mid wing of Hall 1 in my final year. 7th semester went well due to involvement in Dramatics as well as placement help for acquaintances. But in 8th semester, I have been feeling lonely as f*ck.
I have been sitting in my room always, doomscrolling, sleeping or eating. Life is dead for me, and academics are also screwed up. I have literally no one to talk about my life or share my grief. In between there was the Galaxy and Election chaos so time passed. Else it’s just a horror place for me. And all this just destroys the ending of my beautiful life here. My wingies are people of Drams only and few others – they all have made me feel secluded and alienated and left me with no place to go.
I am not involved in any final semester shenanigans like batch video or else. In dilemma whether I am happy or sad as time is passing by as currently it’s so suffocating to be here. Have not been to any trip with anyone in breaks, nor creating any special memory to ponder. Sometimes I feel its better to be unemotionally clever on this campus, get your work done and just do not give f*ck about things. Yet not succumbed to peer pressure of drinking or smoking. I don’t know how the next 2 months will be. It’s just difficult to survive without friends here at this point.
It’s 2nd May, and endsems are almost over for me. What I am writing is just an extension of what I wrote above. The 2 months have been similar – isolating and distressed. In the later days of Techkriti, I had some fun and then was part of 2 batch video shoots – department and hall. Also danced in DE with Vox people. Thanks to Hall 3 kids for felicitation. Other days were in the room only. I could have a few better days if I had good experience in Stage Play but my batchmates did not let that happen too – as I narrated it later. Eventually left groups with them and tried to disconnect. Almost breaking down daily due to this state of affairs.
Honestly, till date – I have not been hit by the emotion of grief for leaving this campus, as everyone else might be getting. I am going to leave the campus on the 16th and till that time will be involved in a few more stuff – maybe more as a formality – Batch and Vox Farewell, Baarat, etc. Obviously not going to attend farewell from the Dramatics Club. And once I will leave, I am certainly not coming back here except at convocation. Leaving with no friends, destroyed memories and regrets. I wish to stay connected with juniors but it is too difficult of course.
It’s 8th July, and I wish to add a bit more to the above. I did attend felicitation by juniors of the Dramatics Club but not the party. This allowed me to put my heart out and express my discontent and break down too much. I said a lot of things which I should not have. Did not attend Baarat but went to Vox and Batch farewell. In between my offer got revoked. I did try to rectify things with people, joined the group again, did a batch video shoot but not much improved. Eventually left on 16th May after meeting as many people as possible.
So that’s how my time ends at IITK – a very tough last semester which I wish to forget. Mental Health problems were real, and no one was there to talk too. Even my plans of writing AWL got disturbed. I was not procrastinating but time had other plans and I am still writing it on 8th July. That’s Life !
WORKERS OF IITK
This is an appreciation for the people who have made our lives very easy – mess, sanitation, dhobis, IWD and several other workers who are integral part of this campus community. They are always helpful irrespective of the apathy they face.
Because of Vox, and maybe due to being part of HEC, I was able to connect with workers on campus in the summers of 2nd year. To be precise, I got a chance to connect with people of Hamara Manch. I had invested more than 6 months in meeting them and understanding worker issues of the campus (like wages, number of working days, admin power dynamics, social inequality etc.)
Obviously I was not able to understand every aspect but that experience enriched my knowledge about IIT Kanpur as a social structure and as a society. The way worker issues were addressed there, and the way they were mobilised to raise concerns was just impressive.
The workers were mostly mess and sanitation workers in our hall. But it was also a forum where I got connected to the issues of cycle shop vendors and Dhobis. I literally got so different aspects and life of IIT Kanpur which many people have been unaware of. As editor of Vox, I published 3 articles related to workers of IIT Kanpur with the help of them. I would surely recommend people to visit Hamara Manch regularly, not just for workers, but for your social development. They meet at 5 PM on every Wednesday at Nalanda School, Nankari.
Website – https://sites.google.com/site/iitkcfdevelopment/hamara-manch
IITK APPRECIATION
IIT Kanpur is a very beautiful palace one can spend the time of his life irrespective of all the bads of the institute. People call our campus a Utopian place, maybe not the best description but our campus deserves appreciation for sure.
- The events organised by Gymkhana, Festivals and other allows one to explore different opportunities apart from academics or just relax and have fun. And we are really open to everyone for participation, providing great learning curves. Rather obvious – but I can assure you it’s far better than any other IIT or maybe any other college of the country.
- With due efforts of our alumnus, we have got power and representation for decision making, whether at hall level or institute level. We have almost an autonomous Gymkhana functioning for various student interests. Believe me, many top IITs lack this. And other colleges even cannot think of.
- IITK provides a lot of opportunities to its students – in terms of everything. Academic freedom, sometimes seems vague, but is very helpful. We have opportunities to pursue research, internship, startups and various other things because of either our alumni or professors. On top of that we have a great SPO who takes care of placements in the best possible way. I know there are problems in all these, but still it is great enough in comparative metrics.
- We have a long drawn freedom – may it be of hostel movement or entry exit in campus. We rarely appreciate this but it’s one of the best things about our institute.
At the same time we have good security too. - In our first year, we are put in wings such that we have people across different branches, places, and communities in our wing. That diversity provides great social exposure to us and helps connect better with people. Same is for our gymkhana too. And we are also able to celebrate different cultures.
- People won’t believe it – we have the best foods in an education institute across India and many people have seconded me on this opinion. Our mess system is very student friendly – HEC has a good control over it. If you do not like mess we have canteen in all halls. Food outlets are great, access to the city is fine and hence we have good food.
- Students here do not come from an elitist mindset, and most people are open to help each other. They all work very hard in different domains. One of our alumni said to me – students of IITK are the toughest people who can face any situation in real life and come best out of it. Our alumnus – whether in Civil services, or in corporate – are performing so well because of this aspect of IITK.
- Alumni of this institute cherish IITK a lot and are always helpful – they can just transform your life with small help too. Their greatness is unimaginable – and connect with us without barriers.
Of course I have more appreciation points – flora and fauna, services on campus, workers etc. but it’s difficult to mention all.
HALL POLITICS AND GENERAL CHAMPIONSHIP
Again a very interesting topic to write upon but a generalised heading. It’s something whose meaning changed over time for me. So I have been a member of HEC of Hall 3 – a post I got motivated for after my efforts in Galaxy 2024. My intent was to change the way HEC functions and become less toxic. But obviously it did not happen because of the work associated with the responsibility.
Nevertheless, I have appreciation for the culture around HEC and GC because it puts you in toughest of situations and when you sail through it – you grow many folds. GC has a lot of its own benefits, even if people do underestimate it. It obviously helps you to connect with a lot of seniors and open gates for you to various Gymkhana Clubs. Though at the same time, I have the opinion that events such as Riwayat and Academia should not be part of GC – which unnecessarily increases load of efforts and highly discourages juniors.
Hall politics is very interesting – because it allows everyone to justify the efforts made by the pool. It also improves unity and competitive spirit across the pools. At the same time, appreciation for the efforts of organising teams. For me, Galaxy is more like a festival and not a competition. Winning and losing is part of the process but the fun everyone has – is crazy ! Scraping events is hence not justified. Even if you do not participate in GC, do visit and appreciate people participating. The last 2 days of Galaxy – Parade, Nukkad, Dance etc. are so mesmerising. Can go long and long on this – but just wish to say – very few colleges in India have such a vibrant culture and it’s our duty to uphold it.
Appreciation for Anmol, Kunal, Chhayank, Asif, Ujjawal, Purav, Chiranshu and several others for good times in our Hall.
ELECTIONS
If you are writing about this campus and not mention about elections, the story cannot be over. Obviously I will write about the lows and lows of elections. But to start with is to have a common ground about our philosophy of elections. I believe student elections reflect the greatness of an institute – not just because of the leadership opportunity it provides to students, but also because it reflects our say in decision making in key matters of this institute. The institute provided an equal weightage to us students by this mechanism in this community.
But obviously we have started destroying this philosophy by our actions. And we are not aware of its future outcomes – how our arms will be twisted. And this is not going to stop anytime soon. And that is for obvious reasons – people are ready to do anything to win elections. We see the worst forms of anti campaigning – and the crazy part, it is not based on credentials of people – but on racism, all kinds of shaming, etc. Most heartbreaking is how elections turn sexist and girls are being demeaned for no reasons. Educated IITians !
Adding to that is ineffective, biassed conduct of the election commission. It feels like they support such kinds of actions more. Even in clear cases they refuse to take bold steps. I usually find no difference between EC of our country and campus – spineless. And how the incumbents from the past 2 years are exploiting that is not explainable. In all this no one cares for the council or the purpose. And GE ’26 is the verdict of that. One can predict the future of councils then.
I have a belief that Hall Politics and Collusion is inevitable in elections and do not have serious issues with it – it’s a reflection of our national democracy. The only concerns regarding this are – some HECs are really inconsiderate about the candidate they project.
Moreover they, along with incumbents, using EC and other means, try to pull down other candidates for false allegations. And this then creates space for Admin to come in, curb our power and elections, and get weaker executives in place.
Hard times will come in due to this – and we are surely not ready for this. Precedence should help in improvement. On top of all this, I wish more girls would come ahead in elections for their better representations as well as improving campus as a society.
Just to mention – I lost senator elections in GE’25 – the only election ever contested.
MENTAL HEALTH
A very heated issues always across campus, primary due to suicides that has happened over past 2 to 2.5 years. And yes I strongly believe that it’s a serious issue, as opposed to my POV a few years back. This last semester is taking a toll on my mental health too. I will take a step forward to say that it is a more pressing issue in the PG community. I have been trying to figure out issues that have pushed our campus to such a situation. Will mention a few:
For UG Community – Loneliness, Academic and Grading System, Inferiority Complex or to say FOMO in general, Intern and Placements.
For PG Community – Professor Power Dynamics, Economic Problems, Career Problems, Loneliness, Unable to cope with academic rigor.
This is obviously a very small list of causes of such a big issue. But these have been the few I learnt in more detail in institute context hence mentioned.
Why is it not solved ? A lot of people have different opinions on this. Some blame it on inefficiency of CMHW or ICS and trust deficiency in it – to which I too agree somewhat. Data leakage from the end of the body is a very obvious example to that. On top of it, no action is taken for such data leakage.
Others blame it on power dynamics between students and professors, and how some professors misuse their power. Inherently everyone does believe in it but we are so handicapped to say or prove the same. We have to live in fear and not complain, as we do not have resolution against that power. Maybe some day we will just get to know the sad realities of the Ombuds Group or ICC.
But apart from these 2 opinions, I have other serious reasons as to why this is not being solved. Firstly we should understand, in any working structure, whether democratic or undemocratic, it will have inefficiency, and more importantly inherent power structure and power dynamics in favour of few on top. So we really cannot get rid of it. But what is more important is how to make the structure work better. This happens when we demand accountability !
After every suicide, we all have a certain rage and we show that by sharing instagram stories or participating in candle marches. And that’s the end of the rage for more than 90 % of the campus community. If I take example of protests of Jan 2024, how many do know what were the demands, why we all were protesting. And after the protest, who all intended to have follow ups on demand. And on top of that we have such great Gymkhana Executives and other student representatives, who have been so opaque always that they do not share updates on demands. They have shaked hands with Admin to become unaccountable and let status quo prevail.
A bold statement to take, after the suicide in January this year, people from Admin, CMHW, Gymkhana should have been resigned from their positions on moral grounds at least. Any structure who has humans with humility, and working for the welfare of students, would have done that. But we just have an open senate meeting where people do not turn up, only few are concerned, and that too have to get silent in open houses of admin because of power dynamics and we all know the student representatives won’t come to save. The system of checks and balances have been screwed – no one wishes to come forward and speak. I would say again – we as a community have become so retarded about our own issues and we just look for excuses to escape. We are not citizens in the literal sense who have nothing to do with accountability. We do not ask right questions, put right demands, or participate in discussions of improvement. That’s the very basic thing that needs to be done.
One more interesting thing to add, the students rarely know about mental health and how it functions. Everyone has wrong concepts about it. You can see practical examples of that when a student consoles another student who reports some sort of mental health issue. Basic trivia – Do you know the difference between being mentally fit and not being mentally ill. I am also not aware of the same. I can say student representatives of CMHW are also not completely aware of the same. It very well reflects in Orientation, which is just a presentation of some boring slides with very little information relevant to students. More to that is their intent seems more like a job to be done rather than to educate. They just try to look cool but have never been constructive for most people, and act anti to Gymkhana activities.
ADMIN @ IITK
A very generic heading to write about. The topic is so vast that it’s difficult to choose what to tell my perspective on. It’s not just about Deans but this ranges to bodies like SSAC, ICC, Director, CMHW, Wardens and many more.
I certainly do not have a complete anti-admin stand. I do appreciate some efforts at times such as new festival guidelines or opening of pre-registration twice.
But at times, the admin of this institute has taken harsh steps that need to be called out.
- To start with, rather obvious, is how it deals with workers on campus. They certainly lack humility towards them. A prime example of it is how dhobi ghat was demolished in early morning without proper dialogue.
- Another obvious, is its lack of humility towards students. A recent example was how information of a student who has left us, was shared on national TV by one of the deans. There are obviously many such examples.
- Admin has started taking several important or blanket decisions without consultation with students. An example of that is the ban on entry of girls in Hall 13, especially the one during our stay.
- I also want to talk about how they use SSAC and several other powers as tools to police students and promote fear mongering. The very obvious example is again how they affect Gymkhana Leadership and elections. Another example is how offices use bureaucracy to curb our events. On paper this all seems fine, but deep down it’s very problematic and people will realise it very late.
- Infrastructure is one of the problems which concerns us everyday. Although its not directly related to admin as the government of the country is pushing more and more students into the institute but without giving accommodation and related funds. This is causing us to be below standard living and neither institute has the voice to improve it.
- How does our admin react to situations and problems – based on how it affects their own image and the institute image. For example, lately, I saw there was no concern shown by them on mental health issues and suicides until January suicide which cause attention of media. They go to no extent being image conscious.
- I talked about admin in several other parts too – Campus Discourse, Mental health etc. so as to call out. Also I can discuss more of the above points if anybody is interested.
CAMPUS DISCOURSE
What do I mean by this ? It’s about what is the political spectrum and discussions that happen around the campus. It’s about the subject that we discuss in context of national as well as institute relevance. A very simple example – Finances of educational institutions.
Why am I writing this ? I have often heard from people on campus that I have so much political discussion in a technical institute. My answer to that is I do not see IITs as just a place one gets a degree but is also a place where a person develops socially after a rigor of JEE. We often claim ourselves to be the best brains of the country – to which I do not agree. We are surely a set of best students in terms of STEM subjects but not as social creatures. We do not have an eye on what is happening in our country or at least we do not care. I personally believe, the resources we are exposed to, the network we have, it’s not for restricting ourselves to science but for the betterment of the country in general.
What do I want to say ? I won’t use complicated terms like left and right wings. I would say there exists two voices of campus discourse in domains of economics and culture – one is pro national regime and one is against. And in my 4 years of stay I have seen a sheer dominance of the one that is pro regime. Campus discourse has shifted a lot to them leaving very little space for debates and discussions on policies. I do not support any of the two voices completely but believe in balance. Several cultural groups are formed and events are organised which support the regime and they have access to power in the system through various ways. I will not take any names in this account of either event or groups. But what effect they have brought – Censorship of “Aasteen ka Saanp” – street play of Dramatics Club in 2024 by admin because of protest of one of such groups. We have also seen ruckus created for the “Jashn-e-Roshni”. Vox tried to host a few speakers in fleet street in 2023, but the admin did not allow it. This is at a cultural level.
At the economic level, we have pushed many policies. The primary example is of H14 Mess issue of 2025, which was a contract kind of system against the BDMR system. Read the article to understand better – https://voxiitk.com/how-mess-functions-at-iitk-part-1-fixed-cost-service-model-fcsc/
There are other examples too – eviction of Dhobis from campus.
For students to relate more – the crunch of students in hostels. It is a direct impact of policies of the government. One should surely learn more about this.
One of the biggest reasons for mental health deterioration among PGs is because of their economic situation – again comes from the same root of problems.
Can explain any of this in detail if someone is interested.
And after all this we are just silent and say,’’ we do not like politics.” Some or other day this will come to you for sure because we have lost the power to speak.
There were attempts to improve discourse by Vox – fleet street was conducted for the very purpose in 2023. But it did not happen again in the next tenures. In the tenure of 2023-24 and in some part of 2024-25 tenure, Vox covered such important issues but later it pivoted to not cover serious issues. Any other body can do it, I really do not know. I had a slight attempt to do so in our annual street play production of 2025 on the topic of civic disengagement.
IIT Kanpur has a great alumni base of civil servants across the country. We are the one who has given rise to Political Consultancy in the country. IIT Kanpur is known for its protest history for within as well as outside campus issues. So I do not think we as students of IIT Kanpur should be so retarded about our surroundings. At least we should have an eye on within campus issues. Else we will keep destroying campus culture. Again to say – we are not just technical students but we are the future of this country. We will soon pay taxes to the government and see it getting wasted in potholes. If we do not speak within campus for such issues, we won’t do that outside. We need to become more educated in terms of policies so there is room for discussion again.
FURSATIYA FOREVER @ DRAMATICS CLUB
The most challenging part to write – the place has my all heart and soul throughout 4 years and its very difficult to put that in words.
How it all started – auditions for freshers were on and all of my friends were taking part in some or other club. This created a FOMO in me, and I decided to go somewhere. When I saw number of kids in Dance, I chose not to go there. Thanks to the advice of Chitresh, one of my wing bapus, who guided me to Dramatics Club. I had a slight experience of Street Play in school so it felt like the right choice. Once I entered the room for Mime, there was no turning back.
After freshers, the next event for us was the Antaragni’22 that was in March 2023. We were called for auditions of mime. Many came with enthusiasm but when were told about staying back on campus in endsem breaks, many backed off later. Some 10 Y22s finally came. None of us knew what was coming ahead. We had insane practices, and that too for Street Play. Our practices had gone up to 15+ hours on days. And it was physically the most challenging for us – jumping, dancing, acting, singing, structures, choreo, running, workout – everything on repeat at high energies. No scope of mistake in front of Y20s and Y19s – who always seemed dangerous to us. We all knew that we won’t get any dialogue to say, but we still stuck around. Frustrated at times, seeing batchmates enjoying Antaragni and we, in old clothes and odd conditions, trying to make things work. Rudraksh and Prathamesh were injured in between. Lakshyta was in Stage Play. The group of 6 on L8 Foyer – Asif, Rudraksh PS, Me, Kunal, Anishka, Anil. Amidst all of this I had my SSAC case going on. Maybe the toughest time for first year like me. Along with all hardships, broken body, hunger, sleepless nights, we got past those 15 days for that one performance – Akhandta ka Dhol. We came 2nd, and more than results, I remember memories. I do not mind having any dialogue because when I saw performances of Y20s, I was just in awe. Also I have seen the toughest phase and practice of the club. All done for one thing – best performance.
(Amidst all this, I lost my good friendships of first semester)
After these tiring days, I thought of resting but HEC of Hall 3 had other ideas. GC on top and I was back to Basketball Court of Hall 3 for Galaxy Street Play. Practices of Antaragni helped me a lot here for getting dialogues and charres (my favorite and USP for sure). Next comes Summer Play workshop, and Dramatics Eve. At this point, I was tired and started feeling excess. I had plans to work at other clubs and places too. Because of that I had some arguments with seniors, as I was already having issues with stage play cast selection. Heated arguments but resolved and I participated. And then became Secretary too.
Honestly, my motivation to become secretary was to go inter – IIT and I knew I had best chances here only – also had the confidence of winning a medal (important for a resume you see).
The road ahead was still not easy. A lot of continuous events lined up – Mime Workshop, Orientation, Freshers, Dramatics Eve. Along with that was the 3rd semester, that too in MTH. I had several other commitments/2nd year PoRs. All of this did not work perfectly. Compromise on commitments, hardly managed academics, tiring schedule, and rift with seniors over discipline and biasness at times. There was a difference in how Y22s were treated in Play than in Nukkad. They had more connect with seniors, and were given more
importance at times. There was an obvious superiority complex. I also had completely lost touch with my older friend groups and was unable to mix with batchmates of the club also. I wanted to leave all at one point but thanks to a few seniors who held back.
The next stop was Antaragni’23. I decided to forget everything, give up all other commitments and focus on this only. Except at one point, academics also did not bother much. 4 Y22s in stage play, 9 in street play. We all were promised to visit Rendezvous for both the competitions and we were highly excited for the same. But post midsem, we were told only the stage play team will go to Delhi and not us. We felt betrayed but were somehow convinced by seniors again (they have got some special skills) and we stayed and had the slogan “Bkchodi Krenge, Mze Krenge, Party Krenge” which became the philosophy for making Gold Winning Street Play – Akal pe Patthar. We made a lot of stuff, which became memories – especially musical scene, Scene 4 and Snippets. In due course we won Gold in Stage Play at Delhi – but that really did not excite me much. The most historic moment for me was winning Antaragni twice in 7 months. We were first in Mime. This set stage for winters – INTER IIT CULTURAL MEET 6.0 at IITKGP. The motivation was high, not just because of results, but due to an incident. IITKGP came for Stage Play competition in Antaragni and left a mannequin in L7, which had a challenge written for us for Theatre Arts Cup.
Brooooooooooooo, if you have been to IIT, you should visit other IITs once for sure. And Inter IIT competitions are the best way to do that. Good enough motivation to be part of Gymkhana then. Nevertheless my journey with IICM started in first year when I was pursuing an article on Cult Meet Review where I got to know about Madras Mayhem. I was very disappointed with what happened there and then inspired at the same time to do better next year. I saw that same among all in the contingent. We begin our practice from the first week of December, in the chilling winters of Kanpur, in the breaks. As we had the above mentioned results, we just have to refine our performances and practice enough. Tried to make a few different scenes but ultimately the core remained the same. We then headed to KGP with full confidence. We were supposed to board the train from Kanpur Central. We reached the station a bit early and that brought another interesting memory. Our seniors gave us different kinds of tasks to do on the platform, such as begging. We did that without any hesitation and it was literally a fun half hour. Nevertheless we reached our destination, the beautiful campus of IITKGP but in the hostels without mattresses.
The day (Day 0) we reached, we had our Mono Act. It went okayish and the next day we had our Stage Play. We had a short tour of campus to find a place for Nukkad practice. We had a run through at 3 AM and it went crazily bad. We all were shocked and a bit demotivated. But we wrapped up, so the stage play team can rest and practice. We had stage play in the evening of Day 1, and it went crazy. But a blunder happened – one of our team members went on stage wearing a hoodie of IIT Kanpur which led us to disqualification from the event. We got to know this on Day 3 although, and our seniors on Day 2 post Nukkad. We were 4th originally but destiny had other plans for us. We had Nukkad on Day 2, and before that we rectified our mistakes and then had a crazy performance again. We were 3rd – maybe at that point the result did not seem justified but down the line I personally agree with it. Mime was on the same day, it went decent but results were otherwise. Our events were completed on Day 2, we got to know all the results on Day 3 by our seniors. I left earlier and got to know via my batchmates. It was very disheartening for all of us, after the efforts we had put in
throughout the year. Many of us cried too. We missed the Theatre Arts podium because of that disqualification. Nevertheless, came back home and was hoping for a rest now.
That was the last event of tenure as Secretary. Galaxy was the next event but I had no serious plans to participate. I wished to focus on my academics as intern season was coming up. I also had to work in Vox for ratification purposes. Moreover, even after Inter IIT, I was unable to have good terms with my club batchmates, nor did I have any touch with my old friends which pushed me more into my room. Very few people know this but I wished to become Coordinator of the club, that too Flow. But I had bad terms with my seniors for reasons I don’t know even today. I was painted very wrong in the club (as opposed to being the most disciplined person of my batch for sure), as one who asks a lot of questions, and does a lot of RR, which made it difficult to have friendship with batchmates or good terms with seniors in the club. I initially started with work at the backend for Galaxy, on flow. We took it to seniors but I was not allowed to even speak. Do not want to get into details of it but due to all this, I did not apply for Coordinator. I also tried to run away from Galaxy, also going home in between.
But Galaxy is a crazy time – your batchmates need help, your HEC won’t let you escape so easily and somehow I was convinced to do it. And then it too became a memory. A group of 7 secretaries managing end to end. Galaxy brings you to such extreme pressure situations and when you sail through it, it’s no less than a victory. One of my instagram posts summarises my Galaxy time. Special thanks to Aditya and Eesh for their help. By the way, all Galaxy performances of Pool Aryans are on youtube, do watch. We always perform to makepeople enjoy and hence it’s for all.
The time came to pass the baton, my batchmates became coordinators. 5 Coordinators – Rudraksh PS (Flow), Prathamesh (Scene), Vinayak (Writing), Asif and Vishal (Both for Play).
We had the first event in April i.e Dramatics Eve. I had no plans to participate but I used to visit L8 foyer almost daily, for 2 reasons – the place had become no less than home and I could not resist going there. Moreover, my batchmates needed help for a while. I was not applying for any managerial PoR so I was free at that time. And the only acquaintances I had were the people in the club. It’s very difficult to leave the space. We prepared and performed, not me though. In the last 2 days I was not part of practice as I was preparing for Editor interview at Vox.
Now it’s time to begin the real work. It was summer after 2nd year and we had to start preparing for the whole tenure, especially Antaragni. I along with Rudraksh PS, Prathamesh and Vinayak started working on flow and topic of street play. Soon we were “imposed” with the topic of Sex Education by our seniors. I personally did not have any issue with it but we did not really get a chance if we should go ahead with it or not and we were “bound” to pursue it subject to our seniors. We worked enough in reading, studying around the topic and had a lot of content to make the flow by the end of June. But in July, we got derailed from the process, and were not able to structure our flow properly because of other reasons – orientation, intern etc. At the same time, our stage play got screwed up because of a sh*t director and his work. Summer ended on a very bad note, and efforts diverted towards Orientation, Freshers and Dram Eve. Rift persisted between people of Nukkad and Play.
But I will spare some time talking about the process of working on Flow. The most unique part of street plays of IIT Kanpur is its detailed research about the issue they are presenting. And when I was involved in the same, I got to know a lot of new things about Sex Education – which changed my thoughts and mindset a lot. It did not just enhance my understanding, but also brought a personality change. I was a sexist by nature (which I did not realise earlier) but when I saw the harsh realities around sex education in our country, it forced me to transform myself. My idea is if my street play is bringing change in me, then it serves the purpose well and has the power to transform society. Similar was my experience in the next tenure when we were talking about civic sense and civic disengagement.
Coming back on tenure, we had events lined up. And came Dramatics Eve in September and we were going to perform our Antaragni’15 Street Play – Aasteen ka Saanp. We were all set, but on the day of performance, we were debarred from performing by the Director and DOSA. Detailed account of it can be read through following link – https://voxiitk.com/report-on-cancellation-of-fursat-mandlis-street-play/
Following this a resolution was passed by the Senate against blanket decisions of the admin and its censorship. I won’t say much about the incident but it was one of the toughest times for me as a person. It was a loss against power, so helpless about what to do. There are so many anti-social elements in the campus and Admin also supports them – nothing can be worse than that. I have always said, the current regime in the Central government, will surely have an exploitative impact on you some day due to its ideology which is devastating for the nation. My first incident was this. I can talk about all this in more detail if someone wishes to.
All that done, we were now to the most important event of tenure – Antaragni. Our flow was not properly prepared for Nukkad. Another artist was called for a workshop for production of Stage Play. Due to that the stage play team was not able to come for practice at the foyer much. We had good time to prepare as there were midsem breaks in between. But things did not work in our favour, things did not sort, Nukkad was mostly at zero. The topic was good,
insights were many but it cannot be done in one single performance due to its nature. We were into the last week of practice and Y21s then intervened. They took charge in their hands and tried to sort things out. But they too were not very successful and we just had a below par production to go ahead with. It was a low key moment again for me – after all efforts nothing went well, we had our worst Antaragni performance in Nukkad. We got bronze in Stage Play but the rift between both teams widened. Mime went well still. I was not motivated at all for Inter IIT. But yes at this point, the seniors who discarded me in my secretary tenure had some appreciation for the efforts I put in at that time. Not the biggest but one of the reasons for me to continue in the club was to show my worth to all people who always disrespected me.
We are back to square one and had to put efforts again for Inter IIT – starting almost from scratch for flow. But at this time we had another task lined up – General Elections 2025. There were two candidates within the club itself for MnC Gensec. Everyone was very adamant about sending someone for the post but not me. We (Y22 Club people) were asked to select one candidate out of 2. Although I was not in favour of this, due to the situation, push from seniors, and differences within the team, I chose one over another. This adversely affected work of flow, as efforts were directed in election preparations. But destiny was different – the person was not willing or motivated to contest for the same, he broke down and eventually backed off after some 20 days. Neither flow was rectified, nor election plans went well and Inter IIT was looming. Even seniors had lost trust in us. You may get different perspectives on this, the above is mine (although missing on details, can be discussed).
After all the drama, Inter IIT practice kicked off from December 5th. Stage play practice started late. But practice was really not making sense as the situation was similar to Antaragni – clueless on how to proceed – no flow, no scene etc. Around mid-December, seniors again took the charge and responsibility. I, along with Umang, was working on flow with Sushmit and Devabrata this time. Jaiveer and Daksh helped too. And we are able to reach some structure to workout and then everything else was then prepared. Scenes were made by Y22s, but Y21s had better ideas so their scenes were finalised on the day leaving for Patna. We left for Inter IIT early but without run-throughs. Just to mention – I hadn’t performed any Nukkad throughout tenure and decided not to do it in Inter IIT too. I was out of practice as well as had serious differences with the team. Seniors appreciated me for my work but did not like this decision. Nevertheless we reached Patna, had serious practices in chilling winters and were ready for competition. Mono Act went crazy – credits to Bhawin, we were 4th. Stage play went well too, but we missed technicalities and hence were 5th. Street Play was good in terms of performance but maybe the topic did not resonate with the judges. We came 7th – I was not expecting a podium but this was not justified according to me. Another shocker was our result in mime (9th) which also went well but maybe missed due to external issues.
Alas, we came back with extreme disappointment but maybe we got used to it and frankly I was out of energy now to think about all this. Semester started, elections happened and life moved ahead. Up next was Galaxy – again a point to prove. I wished to rectify last year’s issues and get that cup. I also wanted to express my skill set developed throughout. And to get that done – a great team of secretaries of Hall 3. Kudos to them for first position in Mime and Mono Act. Stage Play did not go well because of genre but we being 5th was not justified because of delays caused in the morning. Time well spent on Nukkad – great music, great scenes, good flow, well practiced. But we came joint second and no one across the halls could believe it. I would not fear to say Judges were screwed up. But I was used to it and as usual moved ahead. But one thing I will never forget was how I was accused of creating a partisan in club by raging juniors. Serious as f*ck – the place where I spend all my college life – I really cannot think to do it. And the ones who alleged that – they lost all my respect as they discredited all my works and efforts. I was the one who refused to share evidence for contentions against my co batch coordinators. No one will ever recognise that.
Tenure was over, baton was passed to Y23s. A feeling of satisfaction for the work done. In between happened ISEC elections. Proud of the 2 kids – Umang and Vishal. More importantly had deeper respect for Nitish on how he helped all of us. It was a battle fought together by all. Came ahead a more emotional moment – Y21s graduated and it felt like a roof gone from head. That sunk in lately. But in this club, your time does not end in your third year. Another tenure coming ahead – as much as one thinks to detach, he cannot and enough contribution is still required. I was in Bangalore for intern, but was in touch with kids for flow work. Had to get more involved after August, after PPO ofcourse.
As usual, the flow was not ready but the situation was even worse, it was all zero. Based on last tenure experiences, we decided to intervene sooner and get things done by ourselves. I got more involved in readings and discussions, and thanks to my and Prathamesh’s past political discourse, we got some good structure just before Antaragni. In between we had to conduct Dramatics Eve again. Nevertheless, more struggle came down as the duration of practice for Antaragni was less than usual.
We were pretty sure that we had to get involved completely to meet the ends. So happened – flow, scene, songs, writing, snippets, etc. – just everything. We were able because we were involved from August but that did not allow us to enjoy the fest again. Sleep deprived, breaks sacrificed, less support, many fights, hours of practice and then we performed, with 7 Y22s performing – maybe highest number ever of 4th years. The result did not fall in place but not because of performance but because of screwed up judges of Antaragni. We knew that would happen, before the performance itself. Competition did not make sense. But still, concerns were raised over flow again – which no one knows why.
Now my batchmates were solely focused on placements. I was the one involved in overlooking if things can be rectified with Nukkad. Spent a few days in early November on it with juniors, but thanks to them only – they decided to go all alone without discussions and disconnected till November end. First week of December – all were busy with placements and then came the banger – kids screwed up the flow again, nothing to practice on foyer. We did not get involved earlier and asked them to fix things by 14th December but as usual they were zero then also, except in Mime which they cooked hard. But as Inter IIT is at home, we had to get involved again. But this time we were just 5 of us working. So had to make some tough decisions.
We decided if juniors were zero the next day too(which they were), we had to return to what we did in Antaragni. Before we communicated and decided on the same with them, Y23s went crazy – they asked us to leave the foyer and club. Why ? They thought they could do it all alone and didn’t need our help – ego on the top. It was heartbreaking for us obviously – for 2 reasons – one being getting such treatment after giving all to this club and helping juniors so much for 3 years. Another was, how it was a turnaround by the juniors whom I respected a lot. We were almost in the mood to not get involved after this. But due to the gravity of the situation, after a discussion with a few Y21 seniors, we decided to keep our self respect aside.
It was a difficult time to work as there was rift among the two batches and Y23s were rigid in their opinions but did not wish to work. We somehow found a way out – again doing everything to meet ends in chilling winters. We were ready again with performance – but with bad health and throats. Maybe slightly below par too. But with this we were on to the beginning of IICM 8.0, although I was not the performer. So I assisted Vinayak in organising. This was another wild time – 4 days of endless running to conduct 4 events – coordinating with all IITs. To summarise is – All is well that ends well. We were the Theatre Arts Cup Winner – Silver in Stage Play, Gold in Mime, Silver in Street Play and 4th in Mono Act, a historic 222/280 Event points. It was a surreal experience – 3 years toil finally paid off. We ourselves were not able to sink that in. I know a lot of people will have certain allegations but it was a very genuine result. For me and others too, it was a circle completed with satisfaction. We enjoyed it with our seniors and rifts were forgotten with juniors.
Life moved ahead, we were in the final semester. January was about elections, February was about Galaxy. I helped kids across the hall, especially in flow. Lately focussed more in Hall 3. Efforts of Y23s, along with Asif got us Theatre Cup in Galaxy too. Time came again to pass the baton and Y24 were the coordinators now, and our time of farewell. Cultural Extravaganza lined up. It’s the time when we as a graduating batch would have been performing a stage play. I was excited about the same and expressed that to my co batchmates who were planning for it. But then came an expected move from them – a below the belt hit as they decided not to cast me in Stage Play. It was a play with a cast of 11 people. It was not a mistake but intentional. As I had mentioned earlier, the Y22s in play team always had a superiority complex and due to their disliking for me they secretly started practice without telling me. They even casted someone who left the club back. Funnier part was, after a day of practice the person pulled back considering the role to be small.
Performance was not the metric of selection, but who were more friends to the director were chosen. When I got to know about it, I got a lot emotional for obvious reasons, and expressed my protest too. It would have made no sense, had Devabrata (Y21) not been part of the cast. He is one of those gems of our club, who really appreciates and does acknowledge work done by me for the club. My batchmates were crooks, but Devabrata intervened and convinced all of them to cast me. They went below the belt again, giving me just 4 lines to disrespect me intentionally. I was in no mood to do it now but Devabrata convinced me. I did it out of respect for him only and no other reasons. Had any of my batchmates got that 4 line role, they would abuse all of us and leave the practice. I will take that moral high ground and say I have been really generous to them ignoring how they disrespected me.
They did not stop here. We were set to perform a street play too – Itni Freedom Aur Kahan – which revolves around issues of IIT Kanpur. But as I got involved in this too, for figuring out how and what to do, as kids were finding it difficult, they altogether decided not to perform it. No reasons given, but only authority of being PoR holder used. And that time again I realised – how important it is to be a coordinator else your opinion does not count irrespective of work done. But at the same time I would appreciate one person – Vishal. He tried a lot to get things done but was unsuccessful. He is the one person I still do not hold grudges for, for his sensitivity. We may not be very good friends but he is the one person who I feel does care about people. I can’t thank for how he worked with me during placements. Nevertheless, we performed both play and nukkad (Koop Mandook), us not in the later.
This ended all the events for me. And then I decided to leave the people. Exited the Whatsapp Groups, no DE performance and most importantly skipped the farewell i.e. the end tenure party. Emotionally distressing, depressing and helpless. College life seems wasted and that’s what life is. The last 15 days were time to rethink and regain peace. Not the best way to end your club and college life. Did attend the felicitation organised by juniors though and put out my heart there.
When you read through this account, you will see suffocation at various instances. But then comes the question – why I did not leave earlier. By the end of 2nd year I had lost my friendships and Vox was not my type of place. So I thought, being here, helping them, may help in improving friendships. But I was proven wrong. Doing flow became a thankless job. A few kids asked me why I did not perform any Nukkad in third year – it was because these same people do not want me to. Even after my time and effort in Antaragni, they refused to cast me. It was a sheer disrespect and then again I decided to leave. But my seniors wanted me to do Inter IIT and work. I worked again but decided not to perform by myself as a sign of protest. Galaxy became a point for me to prove.
Intern in Bangalore and then PPO helped me relax a bit. I was involved in flow discussion so this got me back again. I was the person who explained flow to my batchmates. So the time was a bit better. They even forgot my birthday and did not wish but I kept all my differences aside because it was placement time. I helped them enough and they all can’t disagree, especially in times of interviews. I thought this could have become a differentiating factor and they start appreciating me more. Added to it was my efforts in Inter IIT but they did not change and started secluding me even more. I have no words to describe the feeling because this place literally took my 3 years. The last 4 months had drained me off.
In all due course of time, I realised loudness mattered more in the club rather than work done – loudness in the sense of telling your supremacy so as to just get your ideas dominated. And in that process, people like me can never communicate ideas independently because I am not the one with PoR or a core team member of Stage Play. You always need to get things approved, having no authority yourself – even after 3 years of toil. It’s true that results are there but how previous tenure (Y22 Coordi Tenure) was clearly showed mismanagement and differences within our team – in which people were not ready to take stand. One may not be able to see it coming, but its been translated to juniors and the club might see its outcomes.
Nevertheless it’s time to end the story – Cheers to great tenures ahead. Lots of learning, good or bad memories, transformations and love for the art. People of the club may not like me, but I do have damn respect for the club and all parts of it. Irrespective of my harsh experiences, I would really suggest my juniors to join the club – it will make a great character transformation in yourself and obviously you will enjoy the process. You may find good friends too. If you want to hear more – do text me for sure. Fursatiya Forever !
P.S. – I do not wish to portray my batchmates in a certain way but it’s just an attempt to put my perspective. I do have a lot of respect from them and would still hope to connect with them better.
Appreciation for Rajeev and Ram Bhai for their help in the journey.
CONCLUSION
So here I come to the conclusion of one of the longest AWLs you might have read. I am not going to elaborate much here. Thank you for reading this account till here. I have suggested various pieces of advice throughout the account so not any more. I just want to write about – What I take away from this journey. I have been lately trying to read almost all AWLs to appreciate my batch a bit more and their journeys. I also went through all the testimonials for me – and that’s the love and appreciation I will cherish. Either it talks about the good times I had with various people or people talking about my socio-political stories on instagram. That’s what IITK has taught me – to be helpful, put forward opinions, educate for society and stand strong in tough times. I will also take away to be associated with the legacy of IITK and with Dramatics Club, Vox Populi, Hall 3 etc. Obviously a lot more in this Love Hate relationship I had.
If anyone wishes to connect with me – my contact number is 7014620655. I always say to people – Ache samay may yaad karo ya na kro, bure waqt may bina soche yaad krna. I have such diverse experiences (everyone has though) – I will surely try to help you.
Signing Off !
Kaushal Jain
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Written By: Kaushal Jain
Edited by: Saurya Singh, Deeksha