Disclaimer: Vox Populi, IIT Kanpur, is the exclusive owner of the information on this website. No part of this content may be duplicated, paraphrased, or interpreted in any other way without written consent from Vox Populi. If you want to reproduce any of the content on this page, please contact our chief editors directly or reach out to us by email at voxpopuli@iitk.ac.in.
In the 67th edition of As We Leave, Savi, a Y22 in the department of Mechanical Engineering, reflects on a messy, dramatic, and beautiful four years at IIT Kanpur. From the chaotic highs of leading the Dance Club to victory to the grueling pressures of placement season, she captures the true vulnerability of the campus experience. Through stories of the deep friendships that served as her safety nets, she reminds us that the best parts of college are the ordinary, unexpected moments that ultimately help us find ourselves.
Disclaimer:- The views presented below are the author’s own and are not in any manner representative of the views of Vox Populi as a body or IIT Kanpur in general. This is an informal account of the author’s experiences at IIT-K.
After procrastinating for an embarrassingly long time, exhausting my supply of binge-watching, video calls, and every other form of avoidance known to mankind, I’ve finally sat down on my bed to write this AWL.
I don’t really know why I wanted to get into an IIT. Every second person around me seemed to be chasing the same thing, so I did too. I barely even studied through most of 11th and 12th. My first JEE Main was in June 2022. My first mock test, Jan 2022. I scored a magnificent 51 out of 300.
I owe a lot of whatever happened after that to Gaurav, my best friend from school, my bbg. If it wasn’t for his constant “Arey tension mat le, IIT Bombay ki flight saath mein book karenge,” I genuinely don’t think I would’ve made it. For six months straight, we did nothing except rant, panic, overthink, reassure each other, and repeat. Somehow, between all that chaos, we made it to iitk, together.
During counselling, my parents wanted me to take 5-year Chemical Engineering at IIT Delhi. But something about it never felt right. IIT Kanpur Mechanical stayed with me till the fifth round, and I froze my choice. If there’s one decision eighteen-year-old me made that I’ll defend forever, it’s this one. Coming to IIT Kanpur is something I’ll never regret. Not because of the placement, opportunities, or even the thousands of memories. IIT Kanpur changed me. It took an unfinished, immature, stubborn, slightly insufferable version of me, and slowly turned her into someone else entirely.
FIRST YEAR
After spending most of 11th and 12th at home, college freedom hit me hard. I could go wherever I wanted, stay out however long I wanted, and naturally, I almost completely forgot that academics existed.
During orientation, I found a friend group. Or more accurately, a bunch of idiots who were confident enough to scream “Love Dose” on stage during Buffer. We called ourselves “Apan Log.” The group lasted two months. At the time, though, we were convinced we had found friends for life. The amount of cringe we collectively generated could probably power the entire campus. We skipped classes. Skipped labs. Roamed around campus on cycles with speakers blasting at unreasonable volumes. Pulled night-outs simply because we didn’t want to stop hanging out. At one point, we literally tore down a giant flex and then tried running away from SIS guards, as if we could outrun them on their motorbikes. The confidence was admirable though. Even though we eventually drifted apart, those memories remain some of my favourites.
My entire first semester consisted of making friends. Lots of them. Some came and went. Some stayed. Pratham, Aadya, Abhishek, Edha, you’ll always have a piece of my heart<3
KOS AND GALAXY
Towards the end of first semester, I got selected for KOS, the Antaragni dance team. At the time, it was just another club. I had absolutely no idea that this club would go on to define my entire college life. That so many of my happiest memories, closest friendships, biggest lessons, and most important moments would trace themselves back to this club.
I remember the first day of practice, I met Vignesh (Jiggy) and Aman. And from that random dance room interaction, they became two of my closest friends all the way till graduation. Back then, we were just timid first-years looking up to our 2nd and 3rd year seniors. They seemed impossibly cool. Impossibly sorted. Like actual adults. I also met Bitthal during this, the most approachable senior (this is a running joke between us, he absolutely hates it when I call him that)
Then came Galaxy, the first time that I experienced hall rivalry. I spent hours arguing with Pratham and Suneet that Hall 6 would absolutely destroy Hall 5 in dance. Then the legendary H5 versus H6 battle happened. (Please don’t look it up, it’s embarrassing) I still remember Sanmati telling me before every round, “Agar iss baar tune split nahi kari na…” Newsflash: we lost the final round miserably. I have never heard the end of it and probably never will.
Girls’ hostel doesn’t experience hall culture the same way boys do. Inferno and Takneek don’t quite have the same energy. But Galaxy? Galaxy is our thing. I’ve done 4 galaxys, as a timid 1st year, as a leader of the team in 2nd year, as a coordinator (got contentions on me for that lmao, thanks h2 🙂 ), and as a 4th year(my babies scored 200/200 points in dance cup). I get it you know, why people become irrationally attached to their halls. I’d admit I don’t feel so strongly about hall 6, but maybe KOS is that for me, what their hall is to them. For me, KOS was home.
SECOND YEAR
Second year came and went fast. Friends changed, friend groups changed. Academics, meanwhile, continued to be a distant concept. I spent most of my time dancing, roaming around campus, making memories, and doing almost everything except studying. Definitely not my smartest decision, but that’s a story for later.
Somewhere during second year, after a lot of overthinking, I finally decided I wanted to go for Dance Club coordinator. I knew exactly what I was signing up for. I knew it would take up ridiculous amounts of time, there would be sleepless nights, continuous run-throughs, stress, arguments, frustration, and several breakdowns sprinkled in between. But I also knew that I couldn’t stay away.
That year, nine of us filled for coordinator. Me, Avinash, Aman, Karunaya and Aadi were already close. We prepared together, stressed together, and convinced ourselves we were all going to make it. Naturally, we made a group called “Hum Hi Banenge.” Halfway through the process, after enough frustration and self-doubt, we renamed it to “Hume Nahi Banna.” The coordinator interview remains one of the most torturous experiences of my college life. Nine hours. Nine entire hours. Worth it. In the end, all five of us got selected. The group name was immediately changed to “Maa Ch*di Padi Hai.” Far more accurate.
At the end of second year, I went on one of the best trips of my college life, Manali. Some people on that trip were barely acquaintances then, but are some of my favorite people now. Bhalu (Sparsh), Sujal, and of course Jassi. Fun fact: Jasraj and I are from the same school. We spent school and almost two years of college barely talking to each other, he’s now one of my closest friends.
INTERN SEASON AND COORDI TENURE
I came back from Manali in mid-May, and suddenly, college stopped feeling easy. It started with saying goodbye to someone very close to me. My coordinator tenure had begun. I had taken up a SURGE project. Intern season was approaching. For the first time, it felt like everything was happening at once. And I was failing at all of it.
The beginning of my coordinator tenure was especially difficult because I cared too much about what people thought of me. There’s a tradition where the secys rank their favourite coordinators after Flashmob. I wasn’t anybody’s favourite. In fact, I was at the bottom of quite a few lists. I still remember crying afterwards. At the time, it felt devastating. But I learnt something. I realised that not everyone will like you. And more importantly, not everyone has to. After that, I stopped worrying about being liked. My focus became Dance Club and winning Inter IIT, building something worth remembering.
At the same time, intern season was in full swing. Most evenings after practice, me, Karunaya and Avinash would sit in RM watching Striver videos mindlessly (me at least). I had absolutely no clue what I wanted to do. I studied for SDE because everyone else was preparing for SDE. I knew a little ML because of my SURGE project, but nowhere near enough. I had no plan. No direction.
I somehow ended up getting shortlists across every possible profile—SDE, finance, data science, core mechanical. And then proceeded to mess up almost every interview. Spectacularly. Every rejection hurt more because deep down, I knew I hadn’t prepared properly.
I eventually got an offer from DRL. I was obviously happy. But I knew this wasn’t the role that excited me.
Anyway, I was finally free. And I could focus completely on dance club now.
When I became a coordinator, there was one thing I had decided. I didn’t want to be remembered as a “female coordinator.” I just wanted to be a coordinator. Back in first year, someone had casually told me that breaking was something only the boys did. That was enough motivation. I learned downrock from my personal bboy, Karunaya, and performed it during Flashmob. To this day, that remains the only time I’ve properly done breaking. Mission accomplished.
Throughout the tenure, I argued endlessly with my fellow coordinators. There were so many discussions where these four boys had one opinion and I was standing on the other side. Somehow we always worked it out. Or, as I’d like to believe, I convinced them.
During Antaragni, I was told by one of my seniors that I couldn’t be a part of the battle team. I was heartbroken, because I knew I deserved that spot and how much I wanted to perform for the team. Thankfully, Bitthal and Vrinda stood by me. I ended up performing with the battle team at both Antaragni and Inter IIT. And I think I did pretty okay.
Throughout the tenure, us 9, bonnies and clydes, along with the most chaotic juniors imaginable, gave it everything we had. And it all worked out in the end.
We won Dance Cup. We won Inter IIT. The highest points ever.
Even now, I struggle to explain what those achievements mean to me. Because the trophies were never the point. The point was everything that happened before them. The people. The journey. The months spent becoming a team. The thousands of hours inside that dance room.
I still remember standing in the final pose of The Greatest Show. The music ended. And suddenly, it was over. There’s always a strange emptiness when a performance ends. You spend months preparing for those few minutes on stage, and then one day, it’s just… done. But this time, the emptiness felt heavier. Maybe because all of us knew this wasn’t just another performance ending. An era was ending. This team would no longer be ours to call, it would belong to our juniors now. And that hurt more than I expected.
Dance Club gave me so much more than dance. It gave me confidence. It gave me my people, these endless memories. I remember how underconfident I used to be while talking to seniors. How nervous I sounded in interviews. How much I doubted myself. I still remember Bitthal telling me, “Ab toh confidently bol, coordi ban gayi hai.”
Bitthal and my amma, Nishita, were my constant safety nets throughout college. I don’t know how many times I’ve bothered them with random crises, overthinking sessions, bad decisions, and unnecessary drama. But they were always there. College would’ve looked very different without them.
PLACEMENTS
After my sixth semester, my CPI stood at 7.4, that 0.1 haunted me. I knew how many companies had a cutoff of 7.5, and suddenly I found myself revisiting every course I could’ve done slightly better in. Maybe that HSS course. Maybe if I had studied a little harder in one of the department courses. Maybe if a professor had graded slightly better. To make things even better, I had 65 credits in my seventh semester because of a DC course I had dropped earlier.
I came back from my internship very prepared, that this was it. This was the last time I’d have to study like this. This was what I had come to IIT Kanpur for. This was where I would finally prove myself. And honestly, for the first time in college, I was disciplined. Till midsems, I attended every class. That DC course was a nightmare. I just couldn’t understand it, which is why I had dropped it in the first place. The professor was infamous for grading harshly, so I couldn’t just do the bare minimum and pass, I actually had to do well. This time, I was also sure about my profile. My first priority was APM, my backup was Data Science. I didn’t want to take any chances, so I ended up studying DSA too, should’ve realised during intern season that I was bad at it 🙂
The entire semester, I skipped parties, skipped hangouts, barely went to the dance room (this probably hurt the most) and spent most of my days sitting in RM and studying. I tracked my preparation obsessively, and there was something satisfying about seeing progress every day. During intern season, I had gone into interviews underprepared and paid the price for it. I wasn’t going to let that happen again. I started doing case studies very early for APM roles even though everyone kept telling me it wasn’t necessary. Thanks to Bitthal, Karunaya and Shreya Rajak (my case buddies<3)
As the semester progressed, things became too chaotic. 65 credits. 3 different profiles. Hours of OAs. Infinite forms. So many of my target companies had a cutoff of 7.5. I couldn’t even sit for their tests. But it got worse. Companies rejected me despite decent OAs. I didn’t get shortlisted from target companies, backup companies, and sometimes companies I hadn’t even thought much about.
Shreya and Aadya were my rocks during that phase. I genuinely don’t know how many times they’ve seen me cry. Probably more than they signed up for. But my breaking point came during endsems. I walked out of the exam hall after my last exam, that DC course. I was CONVINCED that I had failed, that my degree was about to get extended. I called my parents and completely broke down.
Later that night, my dad called again. My parents had come to campus. They didn’t ask any questions. They didn’t even interrupt my preparation. They just wanted to be there. Even if only for a little while. I don’t think I’ll ever forget that.
Then came Day 1.1. I had only two shortlists: Navi and RISA Labs. And honestly, I was on a roll. 8 hours of interviews. Seven rounds in total. I made it to the final rounds of both companies. For the first time, I could actually see my preparation paying off. Every interview felt under control. Then came the results. Rejected from Navi. I was disappointed, but I still had hope. My interviews ended around 8 a.m., and at 10 a.m. I found out that RISA Labs hadn’t hired anybody for the role. By then everyone had either gone back to their halls or fallen asleep. I was alone when I got the news. And I broke. I sat there crying and genuinely didn’t want to give another interview. I was done.
Then came Day 1.2. I had a shortlist from Accenture, but I didn’t even want to sit for the interview. My friends practically forced me to. I gave two rounds, they went okay, and I got the offer. But I wasn’t happy because data Science wasn’t my first choice, I didn’t study so hard for my backup. I still had one interview left, HiLabs, for an APM role. Hilabs hadn’t hired anyone from campus for that role in the previous two years. I walked into that interview with almost no expectations. Four rounds later, I walked out with an offer.
And that was probably one of the happiest moments of my college life. For the first time in months, everything made sense. The endless preparation. The rejected shortlists. The failed interviews. The crying. The uncertainty. The feeling that everyone else was moving ahead while I was standing still. All of it had led here.
For the first time, I genuinely felt grateful for the things that hadn’t worked out. Thank God I didn’t get a tech role during intern season. Thank God Navi didn’t work out. Thank God RISA didn’t hire. Because somehow, I ended up exactly where I wanted to be.
And in case anyone was wondering, I passed that DC course with a C. One of the most beautiful Cs of my life.
LAST SEM & GOODBYES
Last semester was just making up for the seventh semester. After spending months saying no to everything, I made a resolution that I’d say yes to every plan. And that became the perfect way to end college. It wasn’t about doing something grand every day. It was the little things. Going to H4 with Aasmee, Khushu and Gaurav. Everyone sitting in Edha’s room for hours, doing absolutely nothing and somehow everything. That Lucknow trip with Pratham and Jassi. Sitting in B-mid and playing Mafia with Vyom, Sujal, and Bhalu. Going to OAT with Ananya, Anisha, and Shreya, completely out of our senses. Solving and “fixing” Rubik’s cube with Aadya. Ranting to Bitthal about the most mundane things. Giving Abhinav and Tanishq parties, just because. Sitting in DBot with my bonnies and clydes, bitching about the new coordinators, and of course, getting bullied by them for existing. By the end, B211 became my default destination, for reasons both good and bad 🙂
I think that’s what I’ll miss the most. Not the big events, not the fests, not even the wins, although they’ll always mean the world to me. I’ll miss the random walks, the unplanned nights, the same stories being repeated for the hundredth time, and the feeling that there was always somewhere to go and someone to find. It was about all these tiny, ordinary moments that didn’t feel important while they were happening, but now feel impossible to let go of.
Looking back, I’m glad that’s how my college life ended. Messy, dramatic, exhausting, beautiful and entirely worth it.
If there’s anything I’d want to say to anyone still here, it’s this: don’t be in such a hurry to figure everything out. You’ll make wrong choices, lose people, fail at things you thought you’d manage, and cry over problems that will eventually become stories that you’ll mention in your AWL. But somewhere in between all of that, you’ll also find your people, your place, and parts of yourself you didn’t know existed. So let yourself care. Show up. Give your whole to things that matter to you. And when things don’t go the way you wanted, give life some time. Sometimes, it knows what it’s doing.
Written by: Savi
Edited by: Ankita Narang, Suhani Joshi
