As we leave… #1

Mr. Pranjal Prasoon is an undergraduate student in the Computer Science and Engineering Department from the Y15 batch. Read along as he describes his journey through IITK.

It has been raining outside for the past two days, and the campus looks and breathes like heaven. With less than ten days left on campus, everyone around me is trying to live their lives to the fullest.  On the one hand, Ramaiyyah and Deepu Chauhan are filled with final year students partying and trying to grasp as much as they can of the little time they are left with, while on the other, Hall 1 is aglow with sights of people hanging out by the canteen trying to relive the bulla sessions once more. One can hardly miss entire wings rushing out to the Air Strip dressed up in blazers and shorts. (After all, IITians are distinctly identified by “chaddas”).

I have been an avid follower of all the opinions and memoirs that have been published by Vox, and now that I have been asked to write one, it seems increasingly difficult to summarise the last four years I spent at IITK in a single essay. But then, we haven’t learned to fumble at the sight of difficulties, have we?

After JEE Advanced 2015, my life was more or less in shatters. Yes, I did manage to get into IITK CSE, but then, there was always this feeling that I could have done much better. What if I hadn’t screwed up Paper-2?  What if it had gone like one of those AITS, where I was ending up consistently with top ten ranks? With a bag full of “what-ifs” and another full of clothes, that July afternoon I found myself standing in the mess registration queue in Hall 5. And as I look at the rain pouring outside now, sitting comfortably on my bed in C110/1, I am delighted that I came here and spent my time with some of the most phenomenal people in an utterly fascinating framework. In contrast to what the  ‘just out of school me’ would have wanted, I am not graduating with a perfect ten, and I am not going to MIT or CMU for my Ph.D. But, I am happy, content and have learned to follow my dreams.

Before coming here, I didn’t have much to boast about other than my academic prowess. I was an avid quizzer, and I had qualified almost every school level examination there was, but the feeling that JEE preparation and academics held me back from really exploring my interests had always been there. After orientation, I was sure in my head that I will try my best to balance everything and won’t do injustice to one at the cost of the other. It was only later on, in my third year, when I realized that a career in Computer Science wasn’t something I really wanted to go for. And trust me, I was scared to admit it even to my parents. A nine-point-zero third-year student, going for an internship in a software engineering role and claiming that he isn’t interested in his own major isn’t a particularly encouraging sight to behold. Before I go on, I must admit that I have great respect for my peers who have found their calling in Computer Science and have already started making it big in their lives. It’s just that they found it there while I didn’t. A lot of people have asked me the question, “wouldn’t I be wasting the four years of my education” should I choose to take a different path, in both formal as well as informal settings. To that, I have always replied that the mere thought that things I learned in my four years while fulfilling my degree requirements are limited only to the matters pertaining directly to the field of study, is a dissuading one. Whatever I studied, has not only been utilized while writing tests or lines of code, but has taught me to think in a more structured and algorithmic manner. I haven’t just learned how to fetch marks, but have been endowed upon with lessons in perseverance, time-management and taught me to look at things subjectively, and perhaps these are the things that will last longer with me, than a mere sheet of paper.

To be honest, at this point, the amount of time I have spent in Quads and SAC outweighs the time I have spent in the academic area. Starting right from the fresher’s inferno in my first year, then with our pool pulling off a major upset and winning the Galaxy in 2017, all the way through to standing on the pro-nite stage on the last day of Antaragni and rejoicing in ecstasy – there is no place that I would have wanted to be but here. I am glad that I was lucky enough to be a part of a diverse group of organizations – ranging from ELS and CS to Senate and Antaragni – I have had more than a scoop of every flavor this campus has offered. Obviously, the levels of involvement varied in proportion to my interests, but then, each and every one of them has contributed positively to my days here. Extra-curricular activities allow you to explore the hidden tenets of your personality. Not only do you interact with a lot of people and get involved in the grand scheme of things but you are also forced, at times, to introspect and contemplate your own life and actions. Moreover, you make great friends and get soaked in the wonderful feeling of camaraderie that, as of now, feels like it will last me a lifetime. To say at the least, my last year in Antaragni Core Team pulled me out of the depths of depression and had it not been for it; I would have been lying on my bed, sulking my year out. To look back at it, I often think that I was lucky enough that things fell my way, but without being modest, I would like to attribute a bit of it to the fact that I chose not to whine away in my room wasting my free time on the internet, but chose to spend it with people.

Now that I have already exaggerated and boasted about my stay here, I would like to tell you something which is a bit sinister and is in sharp contrast with the dreams we come with to this campus. At times, you might feel alone, anxious and miserable. Four years, after all, is a pretty long time and a crucial one too as we all enter this place as teenagers but graduate as almost full grown adults owning our lives and actions. You might feel cramped and trapped and might want to break-free even before your degree is complete. But then, I would like you to remember that there is not a single person on this campus who hasn’t experienced multiple lows in his/her campus life. Yes, for some of us (which obviously includes me), these lows are a bit lower than they are for the others, but then, that is life for you. You may not seem to realize it often on the campus, but you are amongst the brightest and sharpest in your age group. You managed to tame perhaps the most competitive examination on this planet and are currently in an institution that people are dying to get in. Competition around you and a string of (what you might think are) failures can take a toll, but the real problem begins when you start forgetting the kind of person you actually are, and that is – a strong and competent one. Take that phone in your hand and call your parents or even better, rush home on that rare extended weekend. Go out and barge into the rooms of your close friends. Talk it out, write it out or walk it out – just don’t stay in your room when you are at your low.  The world remembers those who have been star-performers throughout, but those who have fumbled and rose again – the world remembers them even more fondly. And the next time you hear the echoes of “IITK ka tempo high hai”, realize that you are IITK and IITK is you.

Cheers!

Written by Pranjal Prasoon, Edited by Ayush Agarwal