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In this 23rd edition of As We Leave, Mridul Pandey, a Y21 student from the Department of Electrical Engineering, takes us through his vivid, emotionally resonant journey at IIT Kanpur. From an uncertain online beginning and a SITCOM-fuelled JEE-mode first year, to the highs of Inter-IIT, student leadership, and eventually cracking a dream Quant placement, his story captures the beautiful chaos of campus life. Whether it’s mapping out all accessible areas of campus in his early days, exploring rooftops, wrestling with FOMO-driven overcommitments, or stepping far outside his comfort zone — each chapter reflects a fierce pursuit of exploration, self-awareness, and growth. This AWL is a tribute to a journey marked by transformation, serendipity, relentless ambition, and the indelible spirit that makes IITK feel like home.
Disclaimer:- The views presented below are the author’s own and are not in any manner representative of the views of Vox Populi as a body or IIT Kanpur in general. This is an informal account of the author’s experiences at IITK.
Writing an AWL is quite a bittersweet process. Having left the campus only so recently and having said goodbye to everything that mattered over the last four years, it is only fair to feel emotional chaos in your mind. Sitting on your chair, reminiscing about your memories through all those 4 golden years, you start to wonder if life will ever be the same again? You can’t help but miss the serene beauty of the campus, the different spots on campus which have become important landmarks of memories with your friends, you miss the ease with which you could just contact and meet your friends. It all feels surreal yet over. It’s this constant denial, this reluctance to acknowledge the end, that had me procrastinating on this AWL until the very last minute. Though those who know me will say it is only symbolic of my campus journey that I write my AWL right before the deadline.
Looking back at these 4 years, I can’t help but resonate with Steve Jobs’ famous quote:
“It can be hard to trust in the process when you can’t see the bigger picture. But you never know what might be around the corner, so you have to keep moving forward.”
I still recall the naive, innocent version of myself, unsure of my decisions, constantly doubting every move and swept away in the currents of FOMO. Yet, everything I did, all the mistakes I made, the decisions I took(or in all fairness, did not take), make sense now. I’ll forever be grateful to this place as it helped me find myself, understand how I work, my interests, my dislikes and everything that made me who I am today.
My time at college can be seen as an instance of taking seniors’ advice about “Exploring and then committing”(Yes, I am also an RL enthusiast) way too seriously. I remember thinking before coming here that the campus has 1200 people(Y21 only) and 1100 acres of land, I must get to know all of them as well as map out the entire campus. In fact, in the initial years of my campus life, I did just that.
Owing to COVID, a good part of our first year took place online. I don’t particularly have any core memories from this time. Being more of an old school guy in the sense that I like to make friends in person, so the night-long bulla meets didn’t interest me enough. Instead, I found solace in watching numerous SITCOMS(have watched almost all at least 3 times) and doing acads in JEE mode(like an average branch changer enthusiast). While the branch changing dreams ended in the first sem itself, it took offline proceedings to understand how one studies in college.
It is only after coming to the college in an offline fashion is when I would say my college journey really started. I bonded with my wing and found a surrogate family in them. We were together 24/7, having late-night discussions, musical nights, to celebrating birthdays in the crazy IITK fashion (PS: mine was the first birthday of the wing, and of course it was particularly unhinged).
The 2nd sem has got to be the chillest sem out there, with online acads and offline friendships, a true symbol of the slow yet peaceful life.
Slowly, I started going outside and started the exploration I was so excited to begin. I started
meeting new people, socialising and finding myself a core group of friends and the supposed “my people”. We had the time of our lives together, we explored every rooftop, every alley in the campus, often also being chased away by SIS guards for going towards restricted areas. We became remarkably close, having shared a lot of our firsts together, be it having our first trip to Udaipur together or our first nightouts; we started spending most of our days together.
It all seemed to be a perfect cinema-worthy college life, but the cliche of “Good things must end” is unfortunately true. The semester before the intern season arrived, and although I had maintained a decent CPI uptill that point, I felt the need to do more. What followed was a series of questionable choices, often being fuelled by FOMO from my peers. I ended up finding myself having 5 PORs, doing INTER-IIT, having a few prof projects, while at the same time having to manage the toughest BATTI sem (I still get ESO203 nightmares), where 4-5 quizzes per week was a norm rather than an outlier. My social life took a massive hit. I found myself working on the PS till 6 AM, then studying for the quiz scheduled at 9 AM, and I knew something had to give. Through some major help from my friends and seniors, I was able to compartmentalise. I gave up most of the PORs and projects that I had and started to focus on what was important. I
had the time of my life doing INTER-IIT, learning a lot about myself and my interests. It is during this phase that I decided to go for ICG leader as well. I somewhat managed to maintain my acads to some extent as well, but I must say, I have been incredibly lucky in terms of grades throughout my 4 years at IITK, narrowly sneaking out on grade boundaries on multiple occasions.
Then came the summers before the intern season. I was deeply worried about my prep. What followed was a remarkable tryst with destiny. Without much deep thought, I had registered for a BCG case ideathon competition along with my friends (The first prize was a MacBook, so the main motivation was to complete my Apple ecosystem lol). From a lot of eventful episodes of almost missing our flight to finals, to being sleep deprived without any proper run through of our pitch, we ended up winning the competition. And there I stood with an intern offer to BCG, before the intern season itself. I still felt a certain emptiness in accepting the internship offer, since I had dedicated all my life uptill that point towards tech, with my resume reflecting the same. Yet in the name of exploration (and perhaps drowning under a wave of indecisiveness), I accepted the offer.
The third year was a mellow period of my life, where I reconnected with my friends, partied hard together, and kept working on my tech stack (just in case). This was also the time I became the ICG leader and had a memorable experience, connecting with secies, holding sessions and meets, interacting with various organisations, attending conferences, it was important for me to attain clarity about what I really wanted to do in my career.
Then started my internship at BCG. I obviously had my doubts beforehand as well about whether I would like the work or not. I ended up having a not-so-pleasant experience (which, to some extent, can be credited to my overly negative priors). I had even thought of dropping off midway from the internship, but some helpful advice from my seniors (special mention to Akshat Goyal and Shreyansh Agarwal), I ended up completing my internship, while also trying to enjoy my time there to some extent.
It was on the third day of the internship itself when I decided that I was going to sit for placements and had made a roadmap for the same. Being significantly behind everyone due to my lack of tech-based intern prep, I had a lot to do. I don’t have many memories when I look back at the 7th sem, apart from many hours solving questions on Leetcode. I became somewhat underground for the 7th sem, focusing all my energy towards placement (I also missed half of Badshah’s concert due to this, which I still regret). But, in the end, things worked out, and after 5 long hours of a rigorous interviewing process, I got placed in my dream Quant firm.
What followed was a state of absolute peace after 1 year of chaos in my mind. I finally knew I was going to do something that I really liked and looked forward to doing. This was followed by the cliche Goa trip in December, which was just perfect in every sense. It was all about unhinged fun, far too adventurous watersports, strolling across the beaches of Goa, exploring the clubs and casinos, it was all too fun.
The last sem also had a touch of serenity to it. I finally had a sem when I just had to do acads. I had learned how to study and manage acads, thus they too no longer felt like a burden. I decided to focus on myself, have fun with my friends, play *almost* regular badminton, gossip a little too much in CCD, partying harder than ever, while at the same time trying to relinquish all the memories this place had given me. I participated in the dance extravaganza and performed in front of the entire crowd, something that my past self wouldn’t even have imagined doing. I also went on an international trip to Vietnam with my friends during this sem. I even managed to find new friends and memories in the last sem, which I know will last for life.
The 8th semester was the near-perfect ending to my journey at IITK. These 4 years have been the most cherishable and character-defining part of life. Like every JEE aspirant, I had heard during the prep years that “IIT jaake toh life sort hai”, I always used to think that it was from the perspective of getting a decent job, but though that is to some extent true, the greatest gift that IITK gave me was myself. My whole personality development, ability to handle pressure (anyone will become chilled out about academics when you have to give 5 quizzes every week in batti, cause you get no time to stress), living the life on the famous phrase “Chill Hai” has developed here. A lot has happened in these 4 years, from rejection and failures to celebrations over the rooftop, numerous heartbreaks to finding love, feeling socially awkward or introverted at the beginning, to having a chain of friends you can always trust. It has made me ready to face what lies ahead. By learning engineering at IITK, I might not always remember all the concepts of Electrical (to be fair, I don’t think I remember any lol), but it has given me the confidence and ability to face any challenge that lies ahead and the everlasting self-belief within me.
To any junior or aspirant reading it, I would give you the same advice that I was given by my seniors: Explore, find your calling; do what feels right to you; socialize and find your people, don’t be afraid to do something different; and it will all make sense at the end.
Written by: Mridul Pandey
Edited by: Yeva Gupta , Riddhi Shingte
Designed by: Pankhuri Sachan
