Vasundhara Rai is a Y19 graduate. In this piece, she tells us about the various stages of adulting she experienced as a student of IIT Kanpur. Read on to find about her inspirational journey, be it academics, her time in CS & Prayas or about how she navigated her diverse career interests, and how all of this equipped her to face the real world
From July 20th, 2019 when every person in that Shatabdi train’s coach appeared to me as if going to IIT Kanpur, to May 10th, 2023 when I was struggling to hold back tears as my mind was registering these 4 years in the happiest, most adventurous corner of my memory, IITK has changed me for good. (Parents might disagree since my sleep schedule is quite messed up :P). So welcome and thank you for joining me on this journey today as I reminisce about how my life and decisions twisted and turned a flustering number of times (Research -UPSC- Consulting) until it all fell beautifully into place as my stay at campus concluded. Due to my involvement with the Counselling Service, I was blessed with the prospect of interacting with multiple juniors, many of whom came up to me looking for solutions to their problems. This AWL has somewhat evolved out of those conversations and I would be so glad if it brings some new perspective for the readers as well
A smile appears on my face every time I think of those – “cover the gaps”, “bring your umbrellas and pink folders”, headcount, mafia nights, and sessions at Audi. Life was good, life was fast. It was a lot of freedom all at once. The days flew by surprisingly quickly – felt like you woke up, went to classes, had a chat with friends, and went back to sleep. With so many clubs to explore, multiple bulla sessions (all of which felt so important to attend due to FOMO), and not to mention Acads, I was struggling to make ends meet (was also a part of the Basketball and Athletics team). As a result, my first semester hit a 6.3 SPI. I remember traveling in the metro when the email came, and I felt dead inside.
Adulting Stage 1: Learning how to prioritize and say no to things
For me, at least, it was very difficult to say no to an event, a bulla session, or a spontaneous outing plan, I still struggle but those random things which might seem very important at that time, might not appear as big of a deal when you look back at it. It’s all about quality vs quantity.
So thus began our second semester, I was determined to do well this time around, and I did pretty well. Soon we were about to leave for our 10 days of midsem break, but boy oh boy, did we know it would turn into 2 years that would go down in the history of mankind as not only a period of huge despair but also the saga of what humans can achieve when in cahoots with each other. A day before the break, we were shown our MTH102 midsem scripts. A question was left unchecked, and thus I gave it for re-grading. But that question never got re-graded, and I received a B in MTH102. A friend told me that I had lost an A by just a few marks, so I decided to appear for the re-exam. After multiple cautionary emails from the Prof, most students had withdrawn their re-exam request, but I didn’t. Worst possible decision! I was also running for the Hall 6 presidential elections at that time. The day of the re-exam coincided with that of the elections. None of the students were able to improve their grades, and guess what, my grade went from a B to a D. The Hall 6 elections were another fun experience. I had always been in a very close circle during my first year, and thus gathering support from people you never talked to was a difficult task. Although I lost in the end, the difference in the number of votes was marginal, contrary to my expectations. At the same time, as the first-year summers began, I took up multiple SnT projects and a research project under a professor. You see, I had always found myself gravitating more towards biology than mathematics, and thus I was contemplating research as my long-term plan (although UPSC was something that I had always aspired for since I was 10).
Adulting Stage 2: Grabbing every single opportunity that comes your way
Hall 6 elections turned me from a person who would shy away from talking to people to one who actively puts in the effort to initiate conversations with more and more people while respecting one’s own mental bandwidth at the same time. I am glad that I took more on my plate than what I could handle during my first and second-year summers since otherwise, I would have had nothing on my resume (as you would see through my 3rd-year involvements). I was also challenging myself by not following my rudimentary action plan of preparing for UPSC and rather trying my hands at research since IITK offers you a plethora of options to choose from which no other place might provide, and thus with an ample amount of time in hand, you might not wish to miss experiencing them at least once.
Adulting Stage 3: How you define yourself makes all the difference
You identify yourself as something due to performing an activity several times. Once that happens, your subconscious mind makes it your go-to habit. So you see, just as an example – even after being a night owl for so long, pushing myself into waking up early a few times and believing that I was a morning person actually transformed me into that person. “Every action you take is a vote for the type of person you wish to become” – Atomic Habits by James Clear. I still follow my workout schedule almost religiously. It has turned into a habit that helps me to ground myself mentally and have that self-talk.
During the fourth semester and the summer following it, I joined Prayas and Counselling Service. The people I met in these two organizations have been my home away from home. I remember when the college finally reopened and I met the children at Prayas face to face. Every time I returned from there, Nandini (my go-to person since we met, CS buddy also roommate for a brief amount of time) would be quick to mention how my face would be beaming. And why not, one would get instantly humbled by the amount of affection those kids possess to shower at you. Counselling Service was another boon as I got to work with the sweetest people and met so many juniors, conversations with whom have evolved into this AWL. Meanwhile, I constantly kept myself busy with any opportunities that came my way and tried to achieve those small wins
Adulting Stage 4: Small wins are important
if you are someone like me who completely got derailed after JEE and the first 2 semesters at the campus, it’s important to decide the person you want to be and prove it to yourself with those small wins. The confidence they provide is what drives you for the bigger ones. Internships are a tough spot for almost all the people and at that moment, it is crucial to keep your energy up and directed. You are never rude or wrong if you try to cut some things off to save up your energy and mental space. Save it for that one buddy who genuinely roots for you, hold them tight, and support each other through this tide.
Third-year summers were fun. AbInBev is a pretty cool place with super nice people. I received a PPO from there, but as the summers ended, approached the placement heat. Till then I had come across a new term via seniors – “consulting”. The job profile seemed very dynamic – something I crave and it seemed like they might be coming for placements during December, unlike their usual August visits. The Paradox of Choice – I was utterly confused since working at MBB and then going for UPSC didn’t seem like a bad idea. I was weighing their pros and cons. Thus comes a very favorite question by juniors to me – UPSC or placements?
Adulting Stage 5: Being unsure of which path to take is not a bad thing
Talking to a lot of people helps but the answer that you need will come from within. I can’t even remember how many people I talked to – fellow batchmates preparing for UPSC, seniors at MBB, and IAS officers. But none of them was going to make the choice for me. After a lot of days, in fact, months thinking about it, I finally decided to prepare for MBB. You may think a thousand times before you make a decision, but after taking that decision, you need to stick to it no matter what or else it will take you nowhere. I won’t lie and say it was an easy ride. As the seventh semester went on and I practiced cases, I had several episodes of breakdown, doubting if my resume was good or when the cases didn’t go well and I would wonder if I missed my May 2023 UPSC attempt due to a foolish decision. But I persevered.
Dec 1, 2022, was a very interesting day. It also had a certain amount of thrill to it as you saw people running from one interview to the other, looking so put together in their blazers, friends supporting each other, you couldn’t tell the time. The energy, the chaos, the emotions, as if the time had been frozen. I gave 2 back-to-back interviews with Bain, 1 with BCG and then with Nandini, Palak, Imad and Aryash beside me, I awaited any further information for as long as an hour. Some people told me to go and give interviews for other consulting companies where I was shortlisted but somehow, I didn’t care about them anymore. It was either Bain, BCG or UPSC. Soon, I got called for one last interview with Bain, which might have lasted only 7-10 minutes and ended with Pranjal (Bain partner) offering me Thaggu ke laddo saying “Congratulations, we would love to give you an offer”. That moment was surreal, as my mind was registering what had just happened, I had lost any understanding of what to do when someone hands you a Ladoo!
Time since Dec 1, just flew by. My goal was to meet as many people and have as much fun as I could. And I think last semester could not have been spent any better. Another thing I am super grateful to have come across is UHV (Universal human values). It’s an 8-day long workshop conducted by NSS almost every semester at the Outreach auditorium and proposes a very fresh perspective on life. I would highly recommend attending one of these workshops and if you wish to know more about it, feel free to ping me anytime.
Adulting Stage 6: Bidding goodbyes
The weather really blessed our last days at campus. It’s not until you leave the campus that you realize how bad you will miss that rain coming into your room through the window, watching sunset from a rooftop, getting mesmerized as you sip your coffee at CCD and view the sun setting beside the Library, trees looking more red and yellow than green in color, looking forward to Friday dinner’s gulab jamun, 3AM visits to DOAA canteen, talking about random topics as you walk all night round the campus, Methi malai paneer at Hall1 canteen, walking all alone early in the morning with the intention to be fully present in the moment, racing your cycle to the beats of some random new song (reader’s discretion advised, drive slow, drive safe :P), dancing your heart out during fest and appearing for the quiz next morning, speculating about grades before every exam, glaring at ants as they eat away your stack of chocolates, meeting those lovely friends of yours during meals, going for a run after it has rained, having that last game of poker with the CS family and saying “Are hm to milte rhenge” as all of them leave one by one.
That night of 10th May, it was time to leave. After me, my father and Nandini finished dinner, I suggested going to the Chocolate Room, followed by a walk around the campus. As we passed by the OAT, halls, academic area, Basketball court, CS office, I was introducing all of those places to dad, but my mind was somewhere else. In my head, that 4-year-long cassette rewound as I saw those buildings where once my dreams had turned into reality, now being a witness to my memories
Life moves on, we all will, but it would never offer the same amount of freedom, fun and time with friends as it did at IITK. So, staying very present in every moment is all we can do as life unfolds and folds every chapter of our journey. I’ll forever be grateful to this place and the people I met here. Thank you so much for everything and may the force be with you!
Written by- Vasundhara Rai
Edited by- Manasvi N, Aarish Khan
