Saksham Gupta is a graduating Y19 in the Department of Mechanical Engineering. In this edition of As We Leave, he recounts his journey through his years at IITK , of finding and understanding his life’s purpose and quenching his curiosity to do what he wants.
Disclaimer:- The views presented below are the author’s own and are not in any manner representative of the views of Vox Populi as a body or IIT Kanpur in general. This is an informal account of the author’s experiences at IIT-K.
When I decided to pen my memories of this amazing place, I realized how much I’ve changed in these last 4 years. It would be quite rare if you’ve already met a person who wanted to be a mechanical engineer and build machines but then goes on to research cancer biology? Well, here’s my story of choosing this unfamiliar path.
It started with my single-minute dance performance at the Freshers’ Night. I couldn’t have imagined that my introverted and stage-frightened self, who had never performed a dance move publicly, could get on stage in front of a thousand judges and perform confidently after just a 10-day practice. I’m not so sure about the audience, but I was pretty satisfied with my performance. I stepped on the stage once again for the Galaxy group dance for Hall 2. Though those long and exhaustive night-outs did not pay off and we stood last, yet it was a barrier-breaker for my social awkwardness, and it did wonders in my academic life as well, hehe. If I keep all the fun aside, my SPI for the second semester was the lowest of my academic life. I know a lot of people call me maggu (very rightly so), but this was a setback for me, and I decided to get back to academics and leave my dance craze for later.
Now that I had to pivot back to my studies, my next step was to figure out my academic and career interests. The reason I had opted for mechanical engineering was because, at the time, I was pretty sure that I’d like to go into mechanical core industries, build machines and bigger stuff. I joined the IITK Motorsports team to get hands-on experience and also worked on a project with Prof. Ishan Sharma, the coolest prof of my department (I guess). But due to COVID-19, my desire to get hands-on experience and my fantasies of building a car and whatnot got washed out.
Slowly but steadily, I started losing interest in most Mechanical courses as they were all theoretical. I also realized that the courses and in general the whole department was not exactly what I had expected, which was partly my own fault too. I wasn’t so interested in the theoretical aspects of fluids, materials, stress, and solid mechanics, but rather in dynamics, robotics, and building stuff. Whatever the scarce experimental opportunities I could have had vanished due to the pandemic.
All this aimlessness struck me just before our internship season. While everyone was preparing rigorously to secure a plan of action for the following summer, I completely lost sight of my career path. It was probably the worst timing for the confusion that was bubbling in my mind. As a failsafe, I asked myself if I should try for a corporate internship, but neither was I a coding enthusiast nor did I have strong soft skills. Anyway, later on, my interest in the corporate side of the world got weaker and weaker when I saw the struggles my friends had to go through during their internship season.
Around the same time that I started cutting myself off from my own department, I set out to explore the biological sciences. In my first year, LIF101 was one of my most beloved courses – Prof. Pradip Sinha introduced us to genetic engineering and its applications, which fascinated me. During the pandemic, I quenched my curiosity by reading beginner-level books and watching videos on YouTube and educational sites such as Khan Academy. Some of my colleagues and seniors also suggested that I change my department to BSBE. I was afraid of taking such a big leap as it was a very unconventional step, and I was also doubtful about losing interest in BSBE in the future. Had I changed my branch, there would have been no coming back, and I could’ve lost all the advantages that mechanical engineering provided during the placement season. Though the chance of me going through placements was bleak, I still wanted to keep that option secure.
To sort everything out and give myself some more time, I planned to register into the BSBE dual degree programme. During my 5th and 6th semesters, I did a lot of coursework in the department, and after a lot of hiccups, I landed a (cool) project in computational biology with Prof. Hamim Zafar in the BSBE department. This project assured me that I could pursue it as my career path.
As I started flourishing, there came some logistical problems. First of all, there were a lot of course-slot clashes between my ME compulsory courses and BSBE courses. Next, the project was entirely computational, but I had always wanted to explore experimental biology, which I couldn’t do at IITK. Sometime in the midst of my 6th semester, when everyone around me had something planned to do in their summers of third year, I mailed a lot of professors at different places for a research intern, but got rejected from nearly all of them. It was one of the lowest moments in my life – I was helpless and sad to have nothing to do in the summer, which further made me under confident and started a vicious circle that was killing my spirits to do anything. Many students had already secured research internships abroad, but I hadn’t applied to any international internship programmes and didn’t contact foreign professors as I was not confident as to why someone would provide an internship to a person with nearly zero background in their field.
One March evening, three of my friends, Devansh, Tanisha, and Yash had a long talk with me, and they boosted my confidence to reach out for internships. For the next few days, we sat together and prepared my CV. I had already compiled a list of researchers in my interest domains and set out to cold-mail them. As I was already late to get any LOR from my professors, I didn’t have a lot of expectations of getting through, but after many rejections, I got a call for an interview at the end of March.
“Make good friends. They’ll help you make everything possible.”
I was extremely nervous as this was my first ever interview, and I was not an eloquent English speaker. My gang helped me prepare my introduction and the generic questions that I might have to answer during the interview. I still remember that night vividly, my interview was scheduled for 4:30 AM, and I had no formals for the same. While Tanisha and I were revisiting my CV and reviewing the minute details one last time before the interview, Devansh & Yash got me a decent formal shirt. Luckily, I got an on-spot internship offer, and I can still feel the moment when I came outside to tell them the result, and we all hugged.
Though I had gotten the offer, it was just a crack on the surface. In the next 45 days, I had to get the US visa, find accommodations in Seattle – an unknown city, 10,000 kms away- and keep an eye on my academics as the end-sems were approaching. Many-a-times, I got so frustrated and wanted to give up, but now that I held such a valuable opportunity in my hand, I couldn’t have let it go. I used to start my day by visiting various IITK offices to get documents, then attending the lectures and preparing for exams, and finally replying to all my US emails, sending the required documents for the visa, and arranging accommodation. All the while, my gang and Mohit provided whatever support I needed.
After numerous sleep-deprived days, I was able to arrange the visa and the accommodations, and on the side, I also got my best SPI till date. I finally went to Seattle for 2 months, working in the Berger lab at the Fred Hutchinson Cancer Centre, pursuing my interest in experimental and computational biology, specifically cancer genomics. My PI Alice, my mentor Phoebe and many other people in and out of the lab taught me a lot about experimental biology and about different cultures and making my time in Seattle unforgettable. It was an experience that can’t be expressed in words but can only be pictured!
In 2 months, I’ll be joining as a Research Assistant in the same lab to gain further experience. I would finally get a break from the continuous and never-ending coursework that I have been doing throughout my life. I didn’t apply for a PhD this year by choice, and I’m certain that I’ll be better prepared and refreshed after having worked full-time in a research lab.
There’s still stuff that is left unexplored by me at IITK (and most of you would feel the same way when you graduate), but whatever I put my hand on, I never got out without giving enough effort. I kept on trying even when my interest waned, and left only when I had no choice but to move forward to some other thing. The institute gives you a huge amount of freedom (which is sometimes unsettling) to make your own path. In my case, in just two months, my life changed drastically. I was extremely anxious on 20th March 2022, which quickly turned to satisfaction and excitement by 20th May while I was on my flight to Seattle.
In the end, I believe that perseverance and good company can make everything possible. The 4 months during which I arranged the internship, then the accommodations and flights, and finally staying in Seattle all of this gave me enough self-confidence that I feel I can tackle any challenge now. The group of friends I got here always backed me up and helped me through any hurdles I faced. As the cherry on top, my 8th semester was also extremely enjoyable because of all of my friends whom I’ll cherish forever.
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Special Mentions: Parth Patil, Janhavi Bhoge, Manish Meena, Tanya Sinha, Shreya Vaish, Aman Jain, Anubhav Kumar
Written by: Saksham Gupta
Edited by: Mayank Agrawal, Kunaal Gautam
Designed by: Mrunmay Suryavanshi, Manasvi Jain
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